Last day of 2012.
Looking back over the year I am truly amazed its coming to an end. Its been a year of change, refocus, and daring to move forward in various aspects of my life. But at the end of the day, its two steps forward. I firmly believe that perhaps even worse than regressing, is remaining stagnant in who we are and where we are not going.
Life is too short and our impact too great to not move forward.
Many people will make New Years resolutions...and while I'm not a huge fan of setting unrealistic, lofty goals after too many drinks and no consideration to the actual level of focus and determination required, I will inevitably be a part of many of those journeys. It does amaze me though how often we make these health-related aspirations, and begin them hungover, sleep-deprived, and bloated from the festivities the night before.
Want to see me personally fail at something,...let me start in that very condition right there. Hell, just knock 2 hours off my normal sleep time and I am a hot mess for the next 48 hours, and will pretty much live in misery until I can hit the pillow for a solid 7.
With that said, if you have plans to "Eat better!", "Lose 25!", "Exercise more!", or my favorite non-specific goal "Get in shape!" starting tomorrow, you better strap on the big girl/boy pants and embrace the suck for the next few weeks before it becomes routine. January 2nd you will wake up ready to roll, probably having slept in your spandex and pre-gamed the night before with a protein bar. But come January 23rd you are tired, don't feel like it, and will have to muster up every ounce of will power you have to drag yourself out of bed. Do it. Acknowledge you don't feel like it, but do it anyway. You have to learn to push past those points.
The inability to do that is why come February, majority of people are in the same boat they were in on December 31st. Unfortunate, but true.
Healthy choices fuel healthy choices. Its a cycle that YOU can control for yourself, and yes, its your responsibility.
Do I have a resolution?
Eh,...not really.
But perhaps I need to resolve not to sport duct tape on my car for the 4th or 5th time in my life. I've lost track.
Its absurd,...I pulled into the drive-thru at the bank the other day and made a mental note that I pulled a little too close (trying to avoid the 'ol hanging-out-the-window move to reach the machine). Well, after sitting there for more than 20 seconds, I forgot about the mental note and pulled away like I was filming my own version of Fast and the Furious.
Nailed the stupid pole with my side mirror and the next thing I know its dangling like a broken appendage. I was so pissed I wanted to rip the thing completely off and hurl it across the parking lot.
I refrained.
I was in a rush to make an appointment, so I drove across the parking lot to the dollar store.
Scissors and duct tape,...I was going to have my own arts and crafts moment right there in the parking lot.
Its all fun and games until you're nearly getting frostbite trying to reattach car parts with duct tape.
I was hating life,....AND the old man sitting in the truck enjoying the view of this entire ordeal.
I'm sure he found it hilarious. Although, my skills at this particular activity are sadly up to par, so laugh it up big boy.
So here I am entering the new year with a busted mirror, and pulling some Jackie Chan moves to get in and out of my car.
Damn pole.
On a lighter note, we are currently on our annual New Years trip with 3 other couples, a baby, and a growing fetus. (Not in me just fyi), but our group is growing.
I'm not lactating, so currently out numbered.
Its cold, and getting in a 5 mile jog in 30 degree weather with horrible wind gusts was definitely not my favorite, but its done.
After this coffee kicks in I'll be out for round 2. It wouldn't be so bad if I could feel my face. I literally spend the first 3 miles cursing and trying not to focus on the fact that my entire face is getting chapped and my feet are numb.
Its awesome.
Well, its about that time.
Enjoy the last day of 2012, and get your mind right for a new one to come! :)
Monday, December 31, 2012
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Yule Detox
Holy crap I'm alive.
Its been quite the holiday ride since last Thursday, and to say I woke up feeling like a pile of dog poo would be an understatement.
We didn't get home until after midnight, and my body was hating me. Food,...gifts,...more food,...more gifts,...and topped with more sugar, its amazing my pancreas is still functioning. How some people eat like that everyday is truly beyond me.
If you feel horrible, you should.
Ever tried to fuel your car with mule waste?
Exactly.
Your body is no different. Not that I assume any of you are actually eating mule waste, but you get the point...
The holidays can be brutal in the nutrition department with one event to the next.
I get it.
Hell, I have to "pregame" before these events for the sake of my intestines. I'm not talking alcohol.
Two lines into "O Holy Night" at the Christmas Eve service I'm popping gas-x like pez in hopes that the upcoming meal didn't leave me in fetal position wanting my mom and a keg of pepto.
You do what you gotta do.
I was so ready to eat tuna and veggies today I couldn't stand it.
Christmas Day was great though. We drove all over Durham for family events and packed the car with an obscene amount of gifts. Yes, I may have gone a little overboard with Payton and Haven,....shocker.
Sparkles was in rare form, and was standing at the door with her "Sprinkles of Joy" bottle ready to creep everyone out with her yuletide props.
Unbelievable.
This pretty much speaks for itself when it comes to Christmas at my parents house.
Here they are with ALL THE GIFTS....dad's OCD kicked in before anyone got there and he organized the room so everyone had their own pile...including name tags for the piles.
(And I wonder where I get it from...)
That was the cleanest the room was all night.
I was game on after that.
However, my efforts to remain tear-free throughout the night went straight down the toilet. One of the neatest gifts came at the end when Kelly gave us each ladies a note and pearl bracelet with a "P" inscribed on it. The Parker sisterhood was complete.
I think we just sort of formed our own sorority last night....minus the hazing.
Well, it was back to the grind this afternoon.
I took the morning off, which proved to be a smart decision considering I couldn't function until 7am. Coffee helped a little, but failed to work its typical magic.
I need sleep.
Sleep,...and sugar detox until Easter.
I'll leave you with a few more Christmas pics...
Its been quite the holiday ride since last Thursday, and to say I woke up feeling like a pile of dog poo would be an understatement.
We didn't get home until after midnight, and my body was hating me. Food,...gifts,...more food,...more gifts,...and topped with more sugar, its amazing my pancreas is still functioning. How some people eat like that everyday is truly beyond me.
If you feel horrible, you should.
Ever tried to fuel your car with mule waste?
Exactly.
Your body is no different. Not that I assume any of you are actually eating mule waste, but you get the point...
The holidays can be brutal in the nutrition department with one event to the next.
I get it.
Hell, I have to "pregame" before these events for the sake of my intestines. I'm not talking alcohol.
Two lines into "O Holy Night" at the Christmas Eve service I'm popping gas-x like pez in hopes that the upcoming meal didn't leave me in fetal position wanting my mom and a keg of pepto.
You do what you gotta do.
I was so ready to eat tuna and veggies today I couldn't stand it.
Christmas Day was great though. We drove all over Durham for family events and packed the car with an obscene amount of gifts. Yes, I may have gone a little overboard with Payton and Haven,....shocker.
Sparkles was in rare form, and was standing at the door with her "Sprinkles of Joy" bottle ready to creep everyone out with her yuletide props.
Unbelievable.
This pretty much speaks for itself when it comes to Christmas at my parents house.
Here they are with ALL THE GIFTS....dad's OCD kicked in before anyone got there and he organized the room so everyone had their own pile...including name tags for the piles.
(And I wonder where I get it from...)
I was game on after that.
However, my efforts to remain tear-free throughout the night went straight down the toilet. One of the neatest gifts came at the end when Kelly gave us each ladies a note and pearl bracelet with a "P" inscribed on it. The Parker sisterhood was complete.
I think we just sort of formed our own sorority last night....minus the hazing.
Well, it was back to the grind this afternoon.
I took the morning off, which proved to be a smart decision considering I couldn't function until 7am. Coffee helped a little, but failed to work its typical magic.
I need sleep.
Sleep,...and sugar detox until Easter.
I'll leave you with a few more Christmas pics...
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Holiday Hazing
Oscar is going nuts.
He gets on these rants where he'll sprint across the room, skid across the hardwood, pant like a smoker and then repeat the whole thing.
Its his own solo-relay....sad.
He'll get himself so worked up that he'll probably throw up and I'll cap off my night with some Resolve cleaner and a sponge. My decision to go with off-white carpet haunts me everyday.
Orange shag makes more sense than it should.
Well, it was officially my last day in the gym until after Christmas.
The week flew by and I can honestly say I am exhausted, but will be itching to get back by next week I'm sure. Add in 5 family events, and I'll be in rare form just in time for Jesus' birth.
Sweet.
Its a tough time of year for the fitness minded folk. Let's be honest, we're surrounded by fudge, cookies, and every kind of sugar-coated food imaginable. Oh, and lets not forget the beverages. After 3 hours of Aunt Reda's nagging, its amazing you haven't starting hazing yourself.
I get it.
But there is room to have your cake and fit in your pants too.
Plan ahead.
Whoever said you had to eat every item at every event? You're not a squirrel. Stop storing up for winter.
Look over everything and decide on a couple of splurges. That's it. And if you eat a little more than you anticipated, don't assume all is lost and blow the next 2 days as well.
Move on.
Its not the end of the world,...you're not a horrible person,...its one meal at a time. Make the next one good fuel.
Tomorrow looks to be a busy Christmas-prep day.
I've still got a few odds and ends to take care of. 99% chance I'll buy something for myself.
Buyer's remorse?
I have no clue what you're talking about.
Bedtime...
He gets on these rants where he'll sprint across the room, skid across the hardwood, pant like a smoker and then repeat the whole thing.
Its his own solo-relay....sad.
He'll get himself so worked up that he'll probably throw up and I'll cap off my night with some Resolve cleaner and a sponge. My decision to go with off-white carpet haunts me everyday.
Orange shag makes more sense than it should.
Well, it was officially my last day in the gym until after Christmas.
The week flew by and I can honestly say I am exhausted, but will be itching to get back by next week I'm sure. Add in 5 family events, and I'll be in rare form just in time for Jesus' birth.
Sweet.
Its a tough time of year for the fitness minded folk. Let's be honest, we're surrounded by fudge, cookies, and every kind of sugar-coated food imaginable. Oh, and lets not forget the beverages. After 3 hours of Aunt Reda's nagging, its amazing you haven't starting hazing yourself.
I get it.
But there is room to have your cake and fit in your pants too.
Plan ahead.
Whoever said you had to eat every item at every event? You're not a squirrel. Stop storing up for winter.
Look over everything and decide on a couple of splurges. That's it. And if you eat a little more than you anticipated, don't assume all is lost and blow the next 2 days as well.
Move on.
Its not the end of the world,...you're not a horrible person,...its one meal at a time. Make the next one good fuel.
Tomorrow looks to be a busy Christmas-prep day.
I've still got a few odds and ends to take care of. 99% chance I'll buy something for myself.
Buyer's remorse?
I have no clue what you're talking about.
Bedtime...
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
On Hold................
I just changed the light bulbs in the fixture above the table and right now I feel like I'm about to be called up in the rapture.
I'm being overwhelmed by over 300 watts, and 2 seconds away from saying screw it and winging it in the dark. My level of ridiculousness is reaching new heights...
It was a great day in the gym with clients and the talk of Christmas, family, and the inevitable family-detox dominated many conversations.
The number of people who have to travel during the holidays always amazes me....5 hour plane ride,....14 hours in a minivan,....2 day road trip with screaming kids who haven't gotten along since the other came into existence....
If that's not the definition of fun I don't know what is.
Good luck to those of you in this situation.
Better you than me.
No seriously,...I would probably burn some bridges just to avoid that entire experience.
The general consensus was that everyone is slightly overwhelmed, but heading into the holiday full force.
Well, I certainly added to my coffee collection today thanks to a few dear clients :)
Fuel the addiction.
I like it.
Christmas came early for me, which I will not complain. My morning began with a new iPad mini. Thank you Brian!
The odds of a 5 year old learning to navigate this before me are pretty strong, but I am pumped and determined despite my technological shortcomings.
Now I need a purple case.
Ah yes, purple...color of my life.
Side note...I am currently on hold with Time Warner Cable.
I've been transferred 3 times.
You would think I asked them to donate an organ.
They make me hate life more than any one company should. With horrible music blaring in my ear, I am more likely to bust an eardrum before I actually speak to a human being.
Madness.
No please, take your time, I realize your job is horrible...marinade in it a little while I wait with my Blackberry slowly molding to my face...
I had an awesome workout today...extremely sore, but it was good.
Tomorrow looks to be just a cardio day so we'll see how that pans out. Have a great night folks, and brace yourself for an eventful hump day!
I'm being overwhelmed by over 300 watts, and 2 seconds away from saying screw it and winging it in the dark. My level of ridiculousness is reaching new heights...
It was a great day in the gym with clients and the talk of Christmas, family, and the inevitable family-detox dominated many conversations.
The number of people who have to travel during the holidays always amazes me....5 hour plane ride,....14 hours in a minivan,....2 day road trip with screaming kids who haven't gotten along since the other came into existence....
If that's not the definition of fun I don't know what is.
Good luck to those of you in this situation.
Better you than me.
No seriously,...I would probably burn some bridges just to avoid that entire experience.
The general consensus was that everyone is slightly overwhelmed, but heading into the holiday full force.
Well, I certainly added to my coffee collection today thanks to a few dear clients :)
Fuel the addiction.
I like it.
Christmas came early for me, which I will not complain. My morning began with a new iPad mini. Thank you Brian!
The odds of a 5 year old learning to navigate this before me are pretty strong, but I am pumped and determined despite my technological shortcomings.
Now I need a purple case.
Ah yes, purple...color of my life.
Side note...I am currently on hold with Time Warner Cable.
I've been transferred 3 times.
You would think I asked them to donate an organ.
They make me hate life more than any one company should. With horrible music blaring in my ear, I am more likely to bust an eardrum before I actually speak to a human being.
Madness.
No please, take your time, I realize your job is horrible...marinade in it a little while I wait with my Blackberry slowly molding to my face...
I had an awesome workout today...extremely sore, but it was good.
Tomorrow looks to be just a cardio day so we'll see how that pans out. Have a great night folks, and brace yourself for an eventful hump day!
Sunday, December 16, 2012
Pirates, Valor, and Tie-Died Jockstraps
I am throwing down some vegetable soup like a flu victim.
No, I'm not sick, but I had a load of produce I needed to cook so I whipped out the crock-pot and threw everything in there like I knew what I was doing.
I don't.
But its good.
I recently signed up to have crops delivered from local farms,...which is awesome by the way. I'm all about supporting local farms.
Probably because I spent many-a-summer snapping beans til I had no thumbprint on my grandparents farm. Its all fun and games until Mima hands you a knife at age 8 and tells you to start peeling an endless pile of tomatoes. Its probably when I officially learned what an "ass load" was.....more than a lot...but darn if you didn't finish that bucket...
So, my produce box comes every Tuesday, and this last week they sent a large acorn squash. Yes, I love squash and eat around 10 pounds every week, but dear Lord this thing was different. I nearly lost my religion peeling it.
Longest 17 minutes of my life.
My forearm was literally throbbing by the time I threw it in the pot with everything else.
Apparently getting pissed off is part of the homemade-soup-process.
Sweet.
Count me in.
Busy weekend full of shopping and family events...
I was in rare form by the time we made it to my parents' house last night for Dirty Santa Part II. The jockstrap I gave last year made a second appearance....however, my cousin tie-died it.
The fact that he even went to the effort is awesome.
I didn't quite stick to the crotch-theme this year,...but if creepy were a theme I nailed it.
I have a plethora of random photos of friends/family that should never make their way to the public, but for the sake of freaking a few people out or a great game of dirty santa, I will blow it up to an 8 x 10 and put a bow on it.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like a little zip-up valor mid-drift.
We had a blast.
My parents' house always trips me out during the holidays.
My mom decorates every room. But its a different theme as you walk through the house, so my OCD was going nuts.
Not surprisingly, Sparkles got a little carried away with the upstairs decor.
This is what happens when Mardi Gras mates with the circus....
She's out of control.
So excited she can't stand it.
There were numerous highlights of the evening. One being when my 93 year old grandpa unwrapped a t-shirt with a pirate on it that said "Surrender All Your Booty!"
That was pretty great,....he'll rock that at the retirement home like a champ.
As the night wore on and it was just a few of us there, I look over and mom broke out a scrapbook of pictures to show my newly sister-in-law.
Somehow I knew this was coming.
Seriously mom, give the poor woman a few months in the family before you bombard her with all the dysfunction caught on camera.
Its enough to be overwhelming...
Ok, I've nearly got arthritis.
That's my weekend in a nutshell. Game time tomorrow. Looking forward to a full day in the gym.
Night folks.
No, I'm not sick, but I had a load of produce I needed to cook so I whipped out the crock-pot and threw everything in there like I knew what I was doing.
I don't.
But its good.
I recently signed up to have crops delivered from local farms,...which is awesome by the way. I'm all about supporting local farms.
Probably because I spent many-a-summer snapping beans til I had no thumbprint on my grandparents farm. Its all fun and games until Mima hands you a knife at age 8 and tells you to start peeling an endless pile of tomatoes. Its probably when I officially learned what an "ass load" was.....more than a lot...but darn if you didn't finish that bucket...
So, my produce box comes every Tuesday, and this last week they sent a large acorn squash. Yes, I love squash and eat around 10 pounds every week, but dear Lord this thing was different. I nearly lost my religion peeling it.
Longest 17 minutes of my life.
My forearm was literally throbbing by the time I threw it in the pot with everything else.
Apparently getting pissed off is part of the homemade-soup-process.
Sweet.
Count me in.
Busy weekend full of shopping and family events...
I was in rare form by the time we made it to my parents' house last night for Dirty Santa Part II. The jockstrap I gave last year made a second appearance....however, my cousin tie-died it.
The fact that he even went to the effort is awesome.
I didn't quite stick to the crotch-theme this year,...but if creepy were a theme I nailed it.
I have a plethora of random photos of friends/family that should never make their way to the public, but for the sake of freaking a few people out or a great game of dirty santa, I will blow it up to an 8 x 10 and put a bow on it.
We had a blast.
My parents' house always trips me out during the holidays.
My mom decorates every room. But its a different theme as you walk through the house, so my OCD was going nuts.
Not surprisingly, Sparkles got a little carried away with the upstairs decor.
This is what happens when Mardi Gras mates with the circus....
She's out of control.
So excited she can't stand it.
There were numerous highlights of the evening. One being when my 93 year old grandpa unwrapped a t-shirt with a pirate on it that said "Surrender All Your Booty!"
That was pretty great,....he'll rock that at the retirement home like a champ.
As the night wore on and it was just a few of us there, I look over and mom broke out a scrapbook of pictures to show my newly sister-in-law.
Somehow I knew this was coming.
Seriously mom, give the poor woman a few months in the family before you bombard her with all the dysfunction caught on camera.
Its enough to be overwhelming...
Ok, I've nearly got arthritis.
That's my weekend in a nutshell. Game time tomorrow. Looking forward to a full day in the gym.
Night folks.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
8 Ounce Freak-Out
Just me and a bowl of chicken, cabbage, and cottage cheese.
I will put cottage cheese on anything.
Seriously. Dare me. 100% chance I'll like it and you'll lose.
Its a late dinner, but I just got off the phone with Sparkles....it was a 75 minute conversation. For the record, I met my word limit at about 4pm.
I was practically dehydrated by the end. And pretty sure there is an oxygen shortage over at the Parker house.
Dad's probably gasping for breath while mom is on her nightly bedazzling raid.
It was long day,...good, but long.
I had to give my no-sense-in-weighing-everyday-because-you'll-lose-your-mind speech today. It amazes me just how many people engage in this ridiculous habit. And yes, it is ridiculous. Its not A POUND that should cause an alarm. No, its the extreme and irrational freak-out over the pound that's the issue.
Its one thing to keep weight "in-check" and use it as a gauge for progress, but there is a fine line in that and obsession.
Part of taking care of yourself and your health is protecting yourself emotionally. If your emotional stability often depends on half a pound on the scale each morning, its time to step back and regain a proper perspective.
The scale should have no more power over you than the actual batteries in the darn thing...
Well, its bed time.
Short and sweet tonight, but I am falling asleep sitting straight up...
Night folks. Make tomorrow great.
I will put cottage cheese on anything.
Seriously. Dare me. 100% chance I'll like it and you'll lose.
Its a late dinner, but I just got off the phone with Sparkles....it was a 75 minute conversation. For the record, I met my word limit at about 4pm.
I was practically dehydrated by the end. And pretty sure there is an oxygen shortage over at the Parker house.
Dad's probably gasping for breath while mom is on her nightly bedazzling raid.
It was long day,...good, but long.
I had to give my no-sense-in-weighing-everyday-because-you'll-lose-your-mind speech today. It amazes me just how many people engage in this ridiculous habit. And yes, it is ridiculous. Its not A POUND that should cause an alarm. No, its the extreme and irrational freak-out over the pound that's the issue.
Its one thing to keep weight "in-check" and use it as a gauge for progress, but there is a fine line in that and obsession.
Part of taking care of yourself and your health is protecting yourself emotionally. If your emotional stability often depends on half a pound on the scale each morning, its time to step back and regain a proper perspective.
The scale should have no more power over you than the actual batteries in the darn thing...
Well, its bed time.
Short and sweet tonight, but I am falling asleep sitting straight up...
Night folks. Make tomorrow great.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Coffee Fix and Surprise Santa
I knew I'd be tired today, but I had no idea how bad it would be.
I honestly have no recollection of the last 15 minutes of my morning commute. And when Garrett walked in looking like he'd also been beaten in his sleep, I knew we were both in for a long day. We would have injected coffee if we thought it was sanitary.
Or had a needle.
Which, one should never have lying around. Horrible idea.
By 9am I was stupid-tired....and was not responsible for anything coming out of my mouth at that point.
I was a hazard to my own health.
Someone asked me today if I was fully decorated for Christmas.
I do believe in dumb questions.
Uhhh...yeah. I've been ready with my stocking since right after Halloween. I don't play around when it comes to Christmas.
I will not think twice about breaking out the ol Michael Buble album in the middle of June. Does not phase me, and my friends are all over this.
Just to give you an idea, for my bachelorette weekend they decorated the beach condo with lights, wrapped all my gifts in Christmas paper, and before I knew it my friend rushed out of the bathroom in a complete Santa costume.
I didn't get strippers. I got a lap dance from a friend dressed as St. Nick.
Pretty much equal in my book.
This is my life and explains so much...
A little stroll down memory lane. My girls are the best.
Well, on a fitness note, it was another great workout today. Yes, I was dreading every second of it because I was tired, but at some point I tell myself to shut it and keep moving.
The self-love is quite overwhelming during pull-ups, let me tell ya...
I was glad to be done, smelled horrible, and would have laid in the shower if I thought I'd still have hot water after 15 minutes.
Long day.
I gave in to some coffee this afternoon.
Yes, I did it.
I took it to the face like my life depended on it.
I went from protein shake...to coffee...to green tea. My body didn't know what the heck was going on. All I wanted was to wake up and not feel intoxicated while completely sober at 2pm. I was exhausted.
If I don't manage to get some sleep tonight it will be an interesting Wednesday to say the least...
I honestly have no recollection of the last 15 minutes of my morning commute. And when Garrett walked in looking like he'd also been beaten in his sleep, I knew we were both in for a long day. We would have injected coffee if we thought it was sanitary.
Or had a needle.
Which, one should never have lying around. Horrible idea.
By 9am I was stupid-tired....and was not responsible for anything coming out of my mouth at that point.
I was a hazard to my own health.
Someone asked me today if I was fully decorated for Christmas.
I do believe in dumb questions.
Uhhh...yeah. I've been ready with my stocking since right after Halloween. I don't play around when it comes to Christmas.
I will not think twice about breaking out the ol Michael Buble album in the middle of June. Does not phase me, and my friends are all over this.
Just to give you an idea, for my bachelorette weekend they decorated the beach condo with lights, wrapped all my gifts in Christmas paper, and before I knew it my friend rushed out of the bathroom in a complete Santa costume.
I didn't get strippers. I got a lap dance from a friend dressed as St. Nick.
Pretty much equal in my book.
This is my life and explains so much...
A little stroll down memory lane. My girls are the best.
Well, on a fitness note, it was another great workout today. Yes, I was dreading every second of it because I was tired, but at some point I tell myself to shut it and keep moving.
The self-love is quite overwhelming during pull-ups, let me tell ya...
I was glad to be done, smelled horrible, and would have laid in the shower if I thought I'd still have hot water after 15 minutes.
Long day.
I gave in to some coffee this afternoon.
Yes, I did it.
I took it to the face like my life depended on it.
I went from protein shake...to coffee...to green tea. My body didn't know what the heck was going on. All I wanted was to wake up and not feel intoxicated while completely sober at 2pm. I was exhausted.
If I don't manage to get some sleep tonight it will be an interesting Wednesday to say the least...
Monday, December 10, 2012
Dirty Santa, Round 2
I think I put too much garlic on this salmon.
The breath is going to be out of control in about 15 minutes. its fine. I have no plans of making out.
It was another hit-the-ground-running Monday.
I woke up in what I instantly knew was a foul mood, which, surprisingly does not happen too often (shocking, I know). Today was a little different though.
No, I didn't "wake up on the wrong side of the bed". I hate that. Sometimes both sides are wrong. I practically don't move from left side fetal position all night, and if I roll over I meet a wall of 225 pounds,...so no, I literally could not wake up on the wrong side of the bed.
I may start exiting from the foot of the bed just to mix it up.
Branch out.
Go nuts.
Who knows...
Venting moment of the day. Here we go...
Let me begin by saying I appreciate clients who will give everything even when I turn my head or when they think I am not watching. It not only speaks to their commitment, but also to where they are headed. It makes my day to watch people struggle, decide to keep going, push though, and then enjoy the sweet taste of victory no matter how small or big in the big scheme of things.
Its awesome.
With that said, I am completely blown away by those who will blatantly cheat in front of me. Especially the young athletes. Don't talk to me about wanting to improve, meet all these goals and accomplish this or that if you're not willing to work. YOUR WORDS MEAN NOTHING in the face of open disregard for the opportunity to get there. Unbelievable.
I was so frustrated at one point today I had to walk away.
At some point, we choose it. Either its worth it, or its not. Period.
I can do many things, but I cannot force someone to value their health, athletic potential, or the journey required meet goals.
What a day.
My own workout was great day. Despite the fact that I was tired even before I started, I sort of got in a zone and it was on at that point. Shoulders, core, and quads. I was hating life an hour and half later....but glad to be done.
Garrett and I both looked like death.
I'm starting to freak out a little that Christmas is in 2 weeks. Holy night, holy crap, this is getting crazy. I've got a room full of gifts that will not wrap themselves, as well as a few more items to get before I can call it quits.
This weekend is our annual Christmas gathering with my mom's side of the family. We play dirty Santa, and they are already quizzing my mom about what I'm bringing. This is what I get for wrapping a signed jock strap and set of "holiday blue balls" tied to a garden Shepard's hook last year. Its creative yard art.
So I'm feeling a little pressure this year. I told my aunt there would be no crotch-references. The look of disappointment was amazing.
I may have lied, we shall see...
On that note, I need to get in bed and hope to God I wake up ready for Tuesday.
All smiles and glitter....that was a direct shout out to you mom.
Embrace it.
Dance to it.
For the love of God woman, throw your hands in the air and smile like the Sparkle Queen you are!
The breath is going to be out of control in about 15 minutes. its fine. I have no plans of making out.
It was another hit-the-ground-running Monday.
I woke up in what I instantly knew was a foul mood, which, surprisingly does not happen too often (shocking, I know). Today was a little different though.
No, I didn't "wake up on the wrong side of the bed". I hate that. Sometimes both sides are wrong. I practically don't move from left side fetal position all night, and if I roll over I meet a wall of 225 pounds,...so no, I literally could not wake up on the wrong side of the bed.
I may start exiting from the foot of the bed just to mix it up.
Branch out.
Go nuts.
Who knows...
Venting moment of the day. Here we go...
Let me begin by saying I appreciate clients who will give everything even when I turn my head or when they think I am not watching. It not only speaks to their commitment, but also to where they are headed. It makes my day to watch people struggle, decide to keep going, push though, and then enjoy the sweet taste of victory no matter how small or big in the big scheme of things.
Its awesome.
With that said, I am completely blown away by those who will blatantly cheat in front of me. Especially the young athletes. Don't talk to me about wanting to improve, meet all these goals and accomplish this or that if you're not willing to work. YOUR WORDS MEAN NOTHING in the face of open disregard for the opportunity to get there. Unbelievable.
I was so frustrated at one point today I had to walk away.
At some point, we choose it. Either its worth it, or its not. Period.
I can do many things, but I cannot force someone to value their health, athletic potential, or the journey required meet goals.
What a day.
My own workout was great day. Despite the fact that I was tired even before I started, I sort of got in a zone and it was on at that point. Shoulders, core, and quads. I was hating life an hour and half later....but glad to be done.
Garrett and I both looked like death.
I'm starting to freak out a little that Christmas is in 2 weeks. Holy night, holy crap, this is getting crazy. I've got a room full of gifts that will not wrap themselves, as well as a few more items to get before I can call it quits.
This weekend is our annual Christmas gathering with my mom's side of the family. We play dirty Santa, and they are already quizzing my mom about what I'm bringing. This is what I get for wrapping a signed jock strap and set of "holiday blue balls" tied to a garden Shepard's hook last year. Its creative yard art.
So I'm feeling a little pressure this year. I told my aunt there would be no crotch-references. The look of disappointment was amazing.
I may have lied, we shall see...
On that note, I need to get in bed and hope to God I wake up ready for Tuesday.
All smiles and glitter....that was a direct shout out to you mom.
Embrace it.
Dance to it.
For the love of God woman, throw your hands in the air and smile like the Sparkle Queen you are!
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Planes, Trains, and Dysfunction
Every week I have all intentions of writing nearly everyday, and then its like the week punches me in the throat, I develop a case of severe arthritis and writers block, and here I am at Sunday wondering where the time went.
Unbelievable.
Its been a crazy few days to say the least. Between work and family events, I've been running around like a mad woman. That time of year folks,....brace yourself.
I had a family reunion on Saturday. I should probably stop right there.
Honestly though, family reunions can be quite entertaining. I generally leave feeling a little more normal and justified in blaming others for my issues. That's how its supposed to work, right? Kidding,...sort of.
We weren't there 15 minutes before someone practically yells across the room "Where are your babies Meredith?!"
I fought the urge to point to my ovaries and say "Marinating".....instead I just smiled, sat down, and apologized to my unborn children for the dysfunction they would face one day.
Its all equal though,...they put up with me so more power to them.
Gotta love the 'ol family tree...
On another note, I had an unexpected day off today from cardio. I woke up and felt like I'd been plowed by a bus.
My body was dragging. I knew I needed rest, so rest I did.
Tomorrow is back to the grind and I'll be ready to jump aboard the lifting train.
Ok, enough with the locomotive references, my God...
This is short and sweet tonight because I am about 5 steps behind myself. Laundry, dishes, blah blah...
Seriously, all I want to do right now is watch a Christmas movie. I need some mindless time.
Believe it or not, my brain is always in 5th gear.
Some of you would dispute that....to which I say ditto my friend, ditto.... ;)
Unbelievable.
Its been a crazy few days to say the least. Between work and family events, I've been running around like a mad woman. That time of year folks,....brace yourself.
I had a family reunion on Saturday. I should probably stop right there.
Honestly though, family reunions can be quite entertaining. I generally leave feeling a little more normal and justified in blaming others for my issues. That's how its supposed to work, right? Kidding,...sort of.
We weren't there 15 minutes before someone practically yells across the room "Where are your babies Meredith?!"
I fought the urge to point to my ovaries and say "Marinating".....instead I just smiled, sat down, and apologized to my unborn children for the dysfunction they would face one day.
Its all equal though,...they put up with me so more power to them.
Gotta love the 'ol family tree...
On another note, I had an unexpected day off today from cardio. I woke up and felt like I'd been plowed by a bus.
My body was dragging. I knew I needed rest, so rest I did.
Tomorrow is back to the grind and I'll be ready to jump aboard the lifting train.
Ok, enough with the locomotive references, my God...
This is short and sweet tonight because I am about 5 steps behind myself. Laundry, dishes, blah blah...
Seriously, all I want to do right now is watch a Christmas movie. I need some mindless time.
Believe it or not, my brain is always in 5th gear.
Some of you would dispute that....to which I say ditto my friend, ditto.... ;)
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
SWOLE
Hormones are unbelievable.
One day you wake up, splash some water on your face and boom, you just lost 5 years and look refreshed. Other days, you practically drown in your sink in any attempt to not look like you were traumatized in your sleep.
I've learned to keep my expectations low at 4:15 in the morning.
Today just happened to awesome, as I quickly discovered my face was retaining more water than a ShamWow.
Not cool.
You know what's worse than a swollen thumb...ankle...or patella?
A swollen head.
I can't complain though. Today was a good day.
I received some inspirational emails and texts that truly kept me focused and fired up. The timing of those are always ironic...and perfect. So thank you to those of you who constantly contribute to my journey! It means more than you know.
I had a great conversation with a client today about focus and purpose.
She's at a place in her life where she needs to pause, reflect and refocus in terms of "fitness" and what it means to her. Time to assess and perhaps adjust her goals as a runner, as a healthy woman, mother, friend, etc. I think its awesome. The greatest thing we can do sometimes is stop, look at ourselves in truth, see where we ARE, and ponder where we desire to go. Then comes the hardest part...
Consider Is what I'm doing RIGHT NOW a step in the right direction?
I think we often get stuck on the hamster wheel of this-is-the-way-I've-always-done-it and refuse to jump off even when "the way" is no longer effective, enjoyable, or makes any sense.
Unfortunately, we often wait too long to do this and before we know it, we've lost hope/desire that things can be different.
Honestly, I suggest examining this each week. Your schedule, habits, and routine should truly reflect a clear path to your fitness goals. Whether short term or long term, your DAILY lifestyle choices determine your direction and the speed at which you move towards your achievements.
Your path.
Your responsibility.
I was thrilled for her in that moment. Not only was she analyzing and considering WHY she's doing what she's doing, but she was also daring to make changes against the only "normal" she's known for so long.
Ballsiest move yet.
I love it.
Well, I am happy to say I will be in bed in less than 30 minutes along with everyone else under the age of 10 and over the age of 80. I am drained.
Tomorrow looks to be another full day. If I wake up with another bloated head you might find me on the news for completely losing it in public.
Is it possible to soak your face in an anti-inflammatory?...I swear something is inflamed.
Have a great night folks, more to come tomorrow.
Face it like a champ.
One day you wake up, splash some water on your face and boom, you just lost 5 years and look refreshed. Other days, you practically drown in your sink in any attempt to not look like you were traumatized in your sleep.
I've learned to keep my expectations low at 4:15 in the morning.
Today just happened to awesome, as I quickly discovered my face was retaining more water than a ShamWow.
Not cool.
You know what's worse than a swollen thumb...ankle...or patella?
A swollen head.
I can't complain though. Today was a good day.
I received some inspirational emails and texts that truly kept me focused and fired up. The timing of those are always ironic...and perfect. So thank you to those of you who constantly contribute to my journey! It means more than you know.
I had a great conversation with a client today about focus and purpose.
She's at a place in her life where she needs to pause, reflect and refocus in terms of "fitness" and what it means to her. Time to assess and perhaps adjust her goals as a runner, as a healthy woman, mother, friend, etc. I think its awesome. The greatest thing we can do sometimes is stop, look at ourselves in truth, see where we ARE, and ponder where we desire to go. Then comes the hardest part...
Consider Is what I'm doing RIGHT NOW a step in the right direction?
I think we often get stuck on the hamster wheel of this-is-the-way-I've-always-done-it and refuse to jump off even when "the way" is no longer effective, enjoyable, or makes any sense.
Unfortunately, we often wait too long to do this and before we know it, we've lost hope/desire that things can be different.
Honestly, I suggest examining this each week. Your schedule, habits, and routine should truly reflect a clear path to your fitness goals. Whether short term or long term, your DAILY lifestyle choices determine your direction and the speed at which you move towards your achievements.
Your path.
Your responsibility.
I was thrilled for her in that moment. Not only was she analyzing and considering WHY she's doing what she's doing, but she was also daring to make changes against the only "normal" she's known for so long.
Ballsiest move yet.
I love it.
Well, I am happy to say I will be in bed in less than 30 minutes along with everyone else under the age of 10 and over the age of 80. I am drained.
Tomorrow looks to be another full day. If I wake up with another bloated head you might find me on the news for completely losing it in public.
Is it possible to soak your face in an anti-inflammatory?...I swear something is inflamed.
Have a great night folks, more to come tomorrow.
Face it like a champ.
Monday, December 3, 2012
And This Is Called A Real Fork...
Monday.
Is it just me or is there at least one moment every Monday when you question your own sanity,...as well as your ability to restrain yourself from an outright assault...??...
Am I alone on this one?
No matter how well a Monday goes, its always a little nuts on some level. I say hope for the best, prepare for the worst, strap on a cup and charge full steam ahead.
On that note, I was honestly pumped about lifting today since I was 100% healthier and ready to roll compared to last Monday. Alicia Keys and Rihanna blared in my ear on REPEAT, (my OCD also dominates my iPod habits), and by the end I was pretty much convinced I was the Girl On Fire.
Literally,...on fire.
If you do not have that song, I forgive you...for now. Download it. Best $1.29 you'll spend in the next 24 hours, and I don't need to know what else you have planned to buy, but its probably worthless.
Its ridiculous,...when I get stuck on a new song I will listen to it until I hate it.
Certified extremist.
Long story short, awesome workout today...my body will probably hate me tomorrow.
Well, its officially birthday week for my partner in crime, Garrett.
Birthdays are a big deal in my book because it a reminder of the day God decided to pretty much rock the world, bring you in, and often prove He has a sense of humor....and that your parents make poor decisions during a Marvin Gaye serenade.
Ah, I'm kidding.
You're special.
One of a kind.
No one like you.
...I was fed way too many lies before the age of 10...
It was only fitting to start off his birthday week with a few practical gifts. And I do mean practical.
First, a giant bottle of balsamic vinegar.
The kid goes through more of that mess than any normal human being. Walk within 10 feet of his salad while he's eating, and the smell will literally singe your nose hairs. Its unbelievable.
Second gift, a metal fork.
Everyday while devouring his balsamic-molested-salad, he uses a plastic fork. And everyday, he loses at least 2 prongs. I don't quite understand why he must attack the bowl like a Spartan, but he does. And Dixie products fall victim every single time.
I admit, part of this gift is selfish because if he accidentally swallows a prong, I don't have time for an oral scavenger hunt and heimlich maneuver. The day I have to do the heimlich I'd prefer it be someone under 215 pounds. Sorry Garrett. Stick with metal utensils.
Third gift, Q-tips.
The guy is all about some personal hygiene...and he's gone on and on about wanting Q-tips after his post-workout shower. As if they are a delicacy and not found within a quarter mile radius at ANY store near the gym. You know what, DONE. You want a cardboard stick with cotton, you got it my friend. I am the birthday fairy. In spandex.
Whew, its going to be a long, festive week...
Well, its about that time.
Tired.
Dishes in the sink.
Time for bed.
Have a wonderful night folks...game on tomorrow. ;)
Is it just me or is there at least one moment every Monday when you question your own sanity,...as well as your ability to restrain yourself from an outright assault...??...
Am I alone on this one?
No matter how well a Monday goes, its always a little nuts on some level. I say hope for the best, prepare for the worst, strap on a cup and charge full steam ahead.
On that note, I was honestly pumped about lifting today since I was 100% healthier and ready to roll compared to last Monday. Alicia Keys and Rihanna blared in my ear on REPEAT, (my OCD also dominates my iPod habits), and by the end I was pretty much convinced I was the Girl On Fire.
Literally,...on fire.
If you do not have that song, I forgive you...for now. Download it. Best $1.29 you'll spend in the next 24 hours, and I don't need to know what else you have planned to buy, but its probably worthless.
Its ridiculous,...when I get stuck on a new song I will listen to it until I hate it.
Certified extremist.
Long story short, awesome workout today...my body will probably hate me tomorrow.
Well, its officially birthday week for my partner in crime, Garrett.
Birthdays are a big deal in my book because it a reminder of the day God decided to pretty much rock the world, bring you in, and often prove He has a sense of humor....and that your parents make poor decisions during a Marvin Gaye serenade.
Ah, I'm kidding.
You're special.
One of a kind.
No one like you.
...I was fed way too many lies before the age of 10...
It was only fitting to start off his birthday week with a few practical gifts. And I do mean practical.
First, a giant bottle of balsamic vinegar.
The kid goes through more of that mess than any normal human being. Walk within 10 feet of his salad while he's eating, and the smell will literally singe your nose hairs. Its unbelievable.
Second gift, a metal fork.
Everyday while devouring his balsamic-molested-salad, he uses a plastic fork. And everyday, he loses at least 2 prongs. I don't quite understand why he must attack the bowl like a Spartan, but he does. And Dixie products fall victim every single time.
I admit, part of this gift is selfish because if he accidentally swallows a prong, I don't have time for an oral scavenger hunt and heimlich maneuver. The day I have to do the heimlich I'd prefer it be someone under 215 pounds. Sorry Garrett. Stick with metal utensils.
Third gift, Q-tips.
The guy is all about some personal hygiene...and he's gone on and on about wanting Q-tips after his post-workout shower. As if they are a delicacy and not found within a quarter mile radius at ANY store near the gym. You know what, DONE. You want a cardboard stick with cotton, you got it my friend. I am the birthday fairy. In spandex.
Whew, its going to be a long, festive week...
Well, its about that time.
Tired.
Dishes in the sink.
Time for bed.
Have a wonderful night folks...game on tomorrow. ;)
Sunday, December 2, 2012
Those Last Few Bites....
This morning hit me like a bus. A massive bus.
I woke up about 3 times before I actually managed to crawl out of bed and make my way to the coffee maker. That lasted all of 3 seconds before I was back to the couch and completely passed out.
Oh its going to be an eventful Sunday folks.
This past week was pretty much all about recovery from the plague I came down with last weekend. My appetite was honestly nowhere near normal until about Thursday. If you get it, my advice is to strap on a bib and prepare for the worst. You will be hating life.
And then once you're done regurgitating everything from your esophagus to coccyx, be thankful for good health.
One thing I certainly did not prepare for was the aftereffect of reintroducing food back into my system. It was not pretty.
I generally eat a lot of vegetables, but in this case I probably should have gone easy on the broccoli.
I was about 2 florets away from imploding.
I've never hated vegetables so much in all my life.....well, except when I was little and associated eating anything green with child abuse.
Remember when your parents used to say "just eat 7 more bites since you're 7 years old..."
Such crap. I swore I'd revolt once I hit double digits. Eh, I never did. I gave in and ate the overcooked peas (which were by far the worst) and thought I was a genius by making my "7 bites" be exactly 7 peas. What a smartass.
Truth is, I'll probably do the same thing, or just make up stuff like "if you don't eat your vegetables, your limbs will rot off." Slightly untrue, but my God if they still believe in a tooth fairy why am I a jerk for making up reasons to eat healthy?...
I think I'm still bitter from the pea incident.
Ok, onto my day.
Since its actually not freezing outside I may go for a jog....I say this, and yet I can hardly walk because my butt is so sore from Thursday. We'll see how this goes.
Make it a great day folks.
I woke up about 3 times before I actually managed to crawl out of bed and make my way to the coffee maker. That lasted all of 3 seconds before I was back to the couch and completely passed out.
Oh its going to be an eventful Sunday folks.
This past week was pretty much all about recovery from the plague I came down with last weekend. My appetite was honestly nowhere near normal until about Thursday. If you get it, my advice is to strap on a bib and prepare for the worst. You will be hating life.
And then once you're done regurgitating everything from your esophagus to coccyx, be thankful for good health.
One thing I certainly did not prepare for was the aftereffect of reintroducing food back into my system. It was not pretty.
I generally eat a lot of vegetables, but in this case I probably should have gone easy on the broccoli.
I was about 2 florets away from imploding.
I've never hated vegetables so much in all my life.....well, except when I was little and associated eating anything green with child abuse.
Remember when your parents used to say "just eat 7 more bites since you're 7 years old..."
Such crap. I swore I'd revolt once I hit double digits. Eh, I never did. I gave in and ate the overcooked peas (which were by far the worst) and thought I was a genius by making my "7 bites" be exactly 7 peas. What a smartass.
Truth is, I'll probably do the same thing, or just make up stuff like "if you don't eat your vegetables, your limbs will rot off." Slightly untrue, but my God if they still believe in a tooth fairy why am I a jerk for making up reasons to eat healthy?...
I think I'm still bitter from the pea incident.
Ok, onto my day.
Since its actually not freezing outside I may go for a jog....I say this, and yet I can hardly walk because my butt is so sore from Thursday. We'll see how this goes.
Make it a great day folks.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Focus Forward
There are moments in my day when I am made well aware that my level of patience is equivalent to that of a newly potty trained 2 year old.
Today, that moment occurred at 5:15am.
I'm driving up to a railroad crossing and just as I'm approaching, its like time stood still and my personal episode of Back To The Future was about to end in sheer disappointment. I didn't make it. I was going to sit there for what would be the longest 2 minutes and 41 seconds of my day.
I could just picture my mom smiling and saying "Its ok dear, just practice patience..."
Oh for the love of God.
What's my other option? I choose that.
Needless to say, I survived it.....and am no more patient than before the flashing red/white bars slowly lowered and killed my dreams before 6am.
Sorry mom.
Shine on dear woman, shine on....
Well, I'm not quite 100% from being sick this weekend, but today was the best day I've had since pre-turkey fest. I felt stronger, wasn't breathing like a smoker, and made it through a tough back routine and some cardio. And honestly, I actually enjoyed my cardio. Crazy, I know, but I was just thankful to not be moving like a polio-infected amoeba.
* * *
On a more serious note...
There are many areas within my career that I am passionate about, but one that truly hits home is women's health and in particular, self-perception.
I am always blown away by the number of females who genuinely struggle with their self-image on a DAILY basis. More than the I'm-feeling-bloated days here and there...but rather, a deep seeded insecurity masked behind a smile and continual strive for the "ideal" that does not exist.
As I spoke with a woman today about it I could literally feel myself getting heated because I wanted to shake some sense into her.
Its a shame to see a beautiful, athletic, healthy woman beat herself up over NOTHING and choose to live in pit. Do I think events and circumstances contribute to our self perception? Absolutely. But at the end of the day, we have a choice. We can stay in the unhealthy cycle of illusions and perfection-driven habits, or we can break the cycle and dare to not just apathetically accept who we are, but THRIVE and GROW.
I've heard it a thousand times...You don't understand because you've never had kids and have stretch marks......You don't get how tough it is to watch yourself get older.......Things change and I can't wait until you're -- years old....
Ok, you're right.
I don't have kids. I'm 29, not 49. I get it.
Here's to the extent I understand...
I cannot move like I did when I was playing volleyball, running track, and playing softball. I cannot eat whatever I want and expect optimal results. And dear Lord, my inner thighs do not look the same they did a decade ago.
Those of you 10 years older roll your eyes. Fine. The woman 10 years older than you rolls hers. And the woman at the top of the food chain gives us all the finger.
That's life and this game could go on and on.
Here's the deal...at some point we accept age and body changes for what they are WITH the understanding that it is our responsibility and ours alone to take care of it. Will "FIT" at 30 look the same as fit at 20? No. Will "fit" at 50 look the same as fit at 30? No. Why should we expect it to? Dare to believe that you are constantly creating a better version of yourself. The journey continues and the best is yet to come...focus forward. You can either make it great and embrace the opportunity to love and appreciate yourself/health, or you can drive yourself crazy seeking validation in an unattainable goal.
It is a choice.
Sincerely, my desire for all women is this:
Respect your body. Take responsibility. Keep moving forward.
Its been an exhausting day on so many levels.
I need sleep, a little refocus, and for that horrible train to wait until after 6am to pass...
Today, that moment occurred at 5:15am.
I'm driving up to a railroad crossing and just as I'm approaching, its like time stood still and my personal episode of Back To The Future was about to end in sheer disappointment. I didn't make it. I was going to sit there for what would be the longest 2 minutes and 41 seconds of my day.
I could just picture my mom smiling and saying "Its ok dear, just practice patience..."
Oh for the love of God.
What's my other option? I choose that.
Needless to say, I survived it.....and am no more patient than before the flashing red/white bars slowly lowered and killed my dreams before 6am.
Sorry mom.
Shine on dear woman, shine on....
Well, I'm not quite 100% from being sick this weekend, but today was the best day I've had since pre-turkey fest. I felt stronger, wasn't breathing like a smoker, and made it through a tough back routine and some cardio. And honestly, I actually enjoyed my cardio. Crazy, I know, but I was just thankful to not be moving like a polio-infected amoeba.
* * *
On a more serious note...
There are many areas within my career that I am passionate about, but one that truly hits home is women's health and in particular, self-perception.
I am always blown away by the number of females who genuinely struggle with their self-image on a DAILY basis. More than the I'm-feeling-bloated days here and there...but rather, a deep seeded insecurity masked behind a smile and continual strive for the "ideal" that does not exist.
As I spoke with a woman today about it I could literally feel myself getting heated because I wanted to shake some sense into her.
Its a shame to see a beautiful, athletic, healthy woman beat herself up over NOTHING and choose to live in pit. Do I think events and circumstances contribute to our self perception? Absolutely. But at the end of the day, we have a choice. We can stay in the unhealthy cycle of illusions and perfection-driven habits, or we can break the cycle and dare to not just apathetically accept who we are, but THRIVE and GROW.
I've heard it a thousand times...You don't understand because you've never had kids and have stretch marks......You don't get how tough it is to watch yourself get older.......Things change and I can't wait until you're -- years old....
Ok, you're right.
I don't have kids. I'm 29, not 49. I get it.
Here's to the extent I understand...
I cannot move like I did when I was playing volleyball, running track, and playing softball. I cannot eat whatever I want and expect optimal results. And dear Lord, my inner thighs do not look the same they did a decade ago.
Those of you 10 years older roll your eyes. Fine. The woman 10 years older than you rolls hers. And the woman at the top of the food chain gives us all the finger.
That's life and this game could go on and on.
Here's the deal...at some point we accept age and body changes for what they are WITH the understanding that it is our responsibility and ours alone to take care of it. Will "FIT" at 30 look the same as fit at 20? No. Will "fit" at 50 look the same as fit at 30? No. Why should we expect it to? Dare to believe that you are constantly creating a better version of yourself. The journey continues and the best is yet to come...focus forward. You can either make it great and embrace the opportunity to love and appreciate yourself/health, or you can drive yourself crazy seeking validation in an unattainable goal.
It is a choice.
Sincerely, my desire for all women is this:
Respect your body. Take responsibility. Keep moving forward.
Its been an exhausting day on so many levels.
I need sleep, a little refocus, and for that horrible train to wait until after 6am to pass...
Sunday, November 25, 2012
What Were We Thinking?...
Looks like we all survived Thanksgiving, the ungodly amount of food, and those family moments when you're amazed the tree is still standing. I totally get it.
Mine was eventful, and yes, I did eat pretty much whatever I wanted...my pancreas was pumping out insulin like a slushy machine and at some point I think I was sugar drunk. I honestly have no clue how people eat like that on a regular basis. I was more than ready to eat healthy the next day.
And by "next day" I mean waiting in line in Target with Kelly and Sparkles...
It was a site.
She literally looked like this all night. ALL NIGHT. I had to talk her out of buying that elf hat. I shouldn't have to do that....
I have no clue why we torture ourselves staying up all night for the sake of a few gifts. Believe me, we questioned our own sanity more than once...especially in Kohl's, as Kelly and I waited for an hour and a half in line. The woman in front of us had a giant toy firetruck that kept lighting up and making a siren noise loud enough to make you wish you were deaf. I was 2 seconds from destroying that thing right there.
What a night.
We had a blast, took coffee to the face more than once, and at 8am I finally made it home and crawled in bed.
And that was pretty much the end of my normal Thanksgiving break.
Friday afternoon I started feeling weird, and by Saturday morning I could hardly take 10 steps without being out of breath or wanting to throw up.
There was that moment face-down in the toilet when I thought I might hack up my spleen, and Oscar just stared at me like I needed to just suck it up and take it like a champ. I hated that feline right then... Like he can throw up hairballs the size of a ferret but I'm not ever allowed to be sick.
Dumb cat.
Fittingly, I later had to clean up his vomit.
Story of my life.
I spent the day in the recliner watching Hallmark movies. Bad actors. Bad plots. But I figured if I felt horrible I might as well watch horrible tv. Makes no sense I realize, and yet this is how my mind works. It was a long day.
But my dear friend brought me some meds and soup. Granted, she wouldn't get within 6 feet of me, but I didn't blame her.
She didn't ask what she could do she just DID. Awesome gal.
Today has been much better than yesterday, and I was actually able to eat food for the first time since Friday afternoon. Still have not had coffee. Let's not talk about it. I battled a caffeine headache from hell until about 2pm.
If I can't have any tomorrow you might see me on the news.
Back to the grind tomorrow. I truly cannot wait to feel 100%....yes, I probably take good health for granted until I'm face-down hovered over the very spot I've sat on. Life is humbling at times.
Have a great night folks, and ready to roll tomorrow!
A few Thanksgiving pics...
Mine was eventful, and yes, I did eat pretty much whatever I wanted...my pancreas was pumping out insulin like a slushy machine and at some point I think I was sugar drunk. I honestly have no clue how people eat like that on a regular basis. I was more than ready to eat healthy the next day.
And by "next day" I mean waiting in line in Target with Kelly and Sparkles...
It was a site.
She literally looked like this all night. ALL NIGHT. I had to talk her out of buying that elf hat. I shouldn't have to do that....
I have no clue why we torture ourselves staying up all night for the sake of a few gifts. Believe me, we questioned our own sanity more than once...especially in Kohl's, as Kelly and I waited for an hour and a half in line. The woman in front of us had a giant toy firetruck that kept lighting up and making a siren noise loud enough to make you wish you were deaf. I was 2 seconds from destroying that thing right there.
What a night.
We had a blast, took coffee to the face more than once, and at 8am I finally made it home and crawled in bed.
And that was pretty much the end of my normal Thanksgiving break.
Friday afternoon I started feeling weird, and by Saturday morning I could hardly take 10 steps without being out of breath or wanting to throw up.
There was that moment face-down in the toilet when I thought I might hack up my spleen, and Oscar just stared at me like I needed to just suck it up and take it like a champ. I hated that feline right then... Like he can throw up hairballs the size of a ferret but I'm not ever allowed to be sick.
Dumb cat.
Fittingly, I later had to clean up his vomit.
Story of my life.
I spent the day in the recliner watching Hallmark movies. Bad actors. Bad plots. But I figured if I felt horrible I might as well watch horrible tv. Makes no sense I realize, and yet this is how my mind works. It was a long day.
But my dear friend brought me some meds and soup. Granted, she wouldn't get within 6 feet of me, but I didn't blame her.
She didn't ask what she could do she just DID. Awesome gal.
Today has been much better than yesterday, and I was actually able to eat food for the first time since Friday afternoon. Still have not had coffee. Let's not talk about it. I battled a caffeine headache from hell until about 2pm.
If I can't have any tomorrow you might see me on the news.
Back to the grind tomorrow. I truly cannot wait to feel 100%....yes, I probably take good health for granted until I'm face-down hovered over the very spot I've sat on. Life is humbling at times.
Have a great night folks, and ready to roll tomorrow!
A few Thanksgiving pics...
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Holiday Creeper
I woke up this morning in a pseudo-intoxicated state wondering what day it was, where I was, and if I was running late. I was a mess for the longest 22 seconds of my life until I realized it was Tuesday, I was in fact in my bed, and 4:16 was right on schedule. Unbelievable. Nothing like an early morning freak-out to get the day rolling.
This work week has been a quick one. I've got 2 golfers tomorrow and then I am "done" until Sunday.
Honestly, I need to try and get some rest this week, but am well aware that there's a greater chance I'll be up cleaning something by 5am most days. Those of you who are in bed and in deep sleep I curse you....am envious, but I curse you just a little.
On a Thanksgiving note...
Its been a topic for the last week or so in the gym as people gear up for family events and meals that could feed a small village in most countries.
I am always amazed by the number of people traveling for the holidays, and usually dreading some aspect of the whole experience. Either the travel...or the actual people awaiting their arrival.
Ha....laugh to keep from crying....or drinking heavily.
Its the holidays folks. Strap on a helmet and hang on for dear life.
We are fortunate enough to have our entire family within a 25 mile radius. Which should scare the hell out of everyone else in that same area. We're like a reoccurring bad rash.
While we are always expected to be at every event, its nice not to have people stay with us for days on end. No offense to my family, but the last thing I want to see at 5am is the face of someone who is forced to use my toilet and drink my water for the sake of a holiday but secretly wishes we weren't related.
I get it.
Perhaps I'm scarred from the days when my dad would wake me up with a video camera in my face while mom sang soprano. This was my Christmas morning. Pretty sure its not what Jesus envisioned.
It only took him 20 years to figure out people actually get arrested for that crap now.
Creeper.
In all seriousness though, I think its extremely important to actually LIVE in a state of thankfulness. Its sad that we put such emphasis on it for roughly 1 month out of the year and then go on to live our hectic, nose to the grind lives.
We miss the daily blessings.
We miss the moments that come to define us.
We become overwhelmed by things that do not matter.
I genuinely hope amidst the craziness of unruly relatives and sugar-hangovers, we can learn to pause and appreciate the seemingly little things that make life enjoyable, comforting, and a personal journey.
Well, I'm going to get my mind right for the next 3 days.
By Friday afternoon I will not be allowed in public. I will have been out all night shopping and trying to refrain from using judo-moves on anyone before 3am. After that, fair game.
Night folks!
This work week has been a quick one. I've got 2 golfers tomorrow and then I am "done" until Sunday.
Honestly, I need to try and get some rest this week, but am well aware that there's a greater chance I'll be up cleaning something by 5am most days. Those of you who are in bed and in deep sleep I curse you....am envious, but I curse you just a little.
On a Thanksgiving note...
Its been a topic for the last week or so in the gym as people gear up for family events and meals that could feed a small village in most countries.
I am always amazed by the number of people traveling for the holidays, and usually dreading some aspect of the whole experience. Either the travel...or the actual people awaiting their arrival.
Ha....laugh to keep from crying....or drinking heavily.
Its the holidays folks. Strap on a helmet and hang on for dear life.
We are fortunate enough to have our entire family within a 25 mile radius. Which should scare the hell out of everyone else in that same area. We're like a reoccurring bad rash.
While we are always expected to be at every event, its nice not to have people stay with us for days on end. No offense to my family, but the last thing I want to see at 5am is the face of someone who is forced to use my toilet and drink my water for the sake of a holiday but secretly wishes we weren't related.
I get it.
Perhaps I'm scarred from the days when my dad would wake me up with a video camera in my face while mom sang soprano. This was my Christmas morning. Pretty sure its not what Jesus envisioned.
It only took him 20 years to figure out people actually get arrested for that crap now.
Creeper.
In all seriousness though, I think its extremely important to actually LIVE in a state of thankfulness. Its sad that we put such emphasis on it for roughly 1 month out of the year and then go on to live our hectic, nose to the grind lives.
We miss the daily blessings.
We miss the moments that come to define us.
We become overwhelmed by things that do not matter.
I genuinely hope amidst the craziness of unruly relatives and sugar-hangovers, we can learn to pause and appreciate the seemingly little things that make life enjoyable, comforting, and a personal journey.
Well, I'm going to get my mind right for the next 3 days.
By Friday afternoon I will not be allowed in public. I will have been out all night shopping and trying to refrain from using judo-moves on anyone before 3am. After that, fair game.
Night folks!
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Shackled
With the exception of events and the minimal social life I like to imagine I have, I generally spend the weekend swimming in emails and training from behind the computer. From workout programs and nutritional plans, to mentoring young athletes I can honestly say there is never a dull moment in my professional life. Thank God. When I get bored, its never good....pretty much explains much of my decision making of 2001...sorry mom.
But I am always amazed by how much I truly have to study the personalities of my clients. The fact is that part of my "job", (although some trainers fail to get this), is to train/guide clients in the best way possible that will effectively assist each individual in making lifestyle changes.
I do not treat every client the same in the weight room.
I do not encourage everyone the same.
My communication style changes.
Every body/mind/drive/self-perception/personality/habits/etc can be like night and day...exhausting to think about, and yet crucial to understand and appreciate to truly be effective on a daily basis.
With all that said, despite personality differences there are certain topics/issues that I come across pretty regularly when it comes to training and nutrition:
* Women afraid to pick up weights in fear of turning into a man
* People thinking they have to starve themselves to lose weight
* The misconception that if you eat fat you'll get fat
.....the list could go on and on....
But this weekend I was faced with probably one of the most common issues for females trying to lose weight. Yes, I'm sure guys are guilty as well, but based off of my experience its the ladies who struggle with it the most.
And that is....getting on the scale E-V-E-R-Y-D-A-Y.
Some of you already started sweating because you've been on that thing like a pogo stick the last 10 years of your life.
I get it.
Well, my dear client asked me to share this with all of you so I simply cut and pasted straight from my email to her (yes, I can be just as blunt via email). Perhaps it can shed some light on the subject for those of you who are held hostage to the scale...
First, let me celebrate the fact that you were completely on point with everything this week! And to steer clear of the habitual snacking is absolutely huge. That is practicing some serious willpower, but I hope over the next few weeks it will not feel like such a huge exertion of energy to do so...that you won't even have to think about it. Ultimately, we want food to sort of take a backseat in your mind so that you are able to use it as fuel, emotionally detach yourself from it, and truly enjoy life without the constant obsession if you will, about it.
So lets talk about the weight for a second. Here's the honest truth,....KNOWING YOUR WEIGHT ON A DAILY BASIS DOES NOT EFFECT WHETHER OR NOT YOU ARE LOSING, GAINING, OR MAINTAINING. Read that again.
What I want to emphasize is that your need to KNOW the number actually has NO influence on the actual process itself, but only sets you up to be on an emotional rollercoaster. Think about it,...before you step on that scale you are setting yourself up for either a moment of extreme satisfaction or disappointment. And the worst part is that the actual difference between the two emotional extremes can be as little as 1/2 a pound! 8 freak'n ounces. You could crap that. So my point is that its not worth the constant up and down and energy spent to know that number everyday. Because you know as well as I do that if that number is not what you want it to be at any given moment, it will effect the rest of your day. So ultimately you have to release that control and learn (by experience and practice...scary, but necessary), that you can thrive and meet your goals without weighing yourself on a daily basis. Go back and read that sentence in bold....its the absolute truth. :)
.....Continue to attack your illogical thoughts WITH logic. The more you do it, the easier it gets and pretty soon you'll naturally operate in a more realistic, healthy state of mind when it comes to food. I promise, and say this from my own experience.
I am a firm believer in becoming who you want to be to ultimately become who you want to be. What I mean is, if you want to become someone who has a healthier, balanced perspective on food, then you must operate as such before it becomes second nature. You must act like that very person you are striving to become, even when it completely clashes with your nature/tendencies right now. Its like having an athlete who has the opportunity to compete at the national level but continues to train like they did in middle school. If they want to compete at the next level they must train like they're already there.
Its a journey folks, but always moving forward.
Good rest and back at it tomorrow...
But I am always amazed by how much I truly have to study the personalities of my clients. The fact is that part of my "job", (although some trainers fail to get this), is to train/guide clients in the best way possible that will effectively assist each individual in making lifestyle changes.
I do not treat every client the same in the weight room.
I do not encourage everyone the same.
My communication style changes.
Every body/mind/drive/self-perception/personality/habits/etc can be like night and day...exhausting to think about, and yet crucial to understand and appreciate to truly be effective on a daily basis.
With all that said, despite personality differences there are certain topics/issues that I come across pretty regularly when it comes to training and nutrition:
* Women afraid to pick up weights in fear of turning into a man
* People thinking they have to starve themselves to lose weight
* The misconception that if you eat fat you'll get fat
.....the list could go on and on....
But this weekend I was faced with probably one of the most common issues for females trying to lose weight. Yes, I'm sure guys are guilty as well, but based off of my experience its the ladies who struggle with it the most.
And that is....getting on the scale E-V-E-R-Y-D-A-Y.
Some of you already started sweating because you've been on that thing like a pogo stick the last 10 years of your life.
I get it.
Well, my dear client asked me to share this with all of you so I simply cut and pasted straight from my email to her (yes, I can be just as blunt via email). Perhaps it can shed some light on the subject for those of you who are held hostage to the scale...
First, let me celebrate the fact that you were completely on point with everything this week! And to steer clear of the habitual snacking is absolutely huge. That is practicing some serious willpower, but I hope over the next few weeks it will not feel like such a huge exertion of energy to do so...that you won't even have to think about it. Ultimately, we want food to sort of take a backseat in your mind so that you are able to use it as fuel, emotionally detach yourself from it, and truly enjoy life without the constant obsession if you will, about it.
So lets talk about the weight for a second. Here's the honest truth,....KNOWING YOUR WEIGHT ON A DAILY BASIS DOES NOT EFFECT WHETHER OR NOT YOU ARE LOSING, GAINING, OR MAINTAINING. Read that again.
What I want to emphasize is that your need to KNOW the number actually has NO influence on the actual process itself, but only sets you up to be on an emotional rollercoaster. Think about it,...before you step on that scale you are setting yourself up for either a moment of extreme satisfaction or disappointment. And the worst part is that the actual difference between the two emotional extremes can be as little as 1/2 a pound! 8 freak'n ounces. You could crap that. So my point is that its not worth the constant up and down and energy spent to know that number everyday. Because you know as well as I do that if that number is not what you want it to be at any given moment, it will effect the rest of your day. So ultimately you have to release that control and learn (by experience and practice...scary, but necessary), that you can thrive and meet your goals without weighing yourself on a daily basis. Go back and read that sentence in bold....its the absolute truth. :)
.....Continue to attack your illogical thoughts WITH logic. The more you do it, the easier it gets and pretty soon you'll naturally operate in a more realistic, healthy state of mind when it comes to food. I promise, and say this from my own experience.
I am a firm believer in becoming who you want to be to ultimately become who you want to be. What I mean is, if you want to become someone who has a healthier, balanced perspective on food, then you must operate as such before it becomes second nature. You must act like that very person you are striving to become, even when it completely clashes with your nature/tendencies right now. Its like having an athlete who has the opportunity to compete at the national level but continues to train like they did in middle school. If they want to compete at the next level they must train like they're already there.
Its a journey folks, but always moving forward.
Good rest and back at it tomorrow...
Friday, November 16, 2012
A Few More Candles
At what age is it appropriate for me to rock this?...
I was at a local country club training one of my golfers and an older man, (note I did not say OLD...my God, before I start getting emails), was sporting this shirt like a champ. I asked him if I could get a picture and you would have thought I asked for an autograph. It was great....pretty much made my day.
I think you simply get to a certain age when you wear what you want....fanny pack...light up sweaters...velcro...who cares.
I might bring back stirrup pants. They make complete sense except for the fact that the actual stirrups, which are the essence of the pants, pull the crotch down to the knees. After 5 steps I'm not trying to walk around with half a foot worth of extra material between my legs.
Mini fashion nightmare, and yet made sense in 1987. But so did shoulder pads and the Eurythmics.
Enough said.
Wednesday night was my dear friend Jill's 60th birthday party, and I think I laughed until I cried nearly all night. It was an ovaries-only party, so of course the conversation was entertaining and generally circled the topic of men, menopause, and everything in between. I had an absolute blast.
Several of them joked that I was the youngest there and a trooper for hanging out with these ladies. Are you kidding?! I am pretty much a menopausal 29 year old....I go to bed well before all of them and at any given moment am about 3 ounces of water away from needing Depends.
It was my pleasure to be amongst them for the evening.
Not going to lie though,...to wake up at 4 and make it until 11pm that night was a feat in itself. I should not be held accountable for what came out of my mouth post-8pm. I typically reach a whole new level of ridiculous.
When someone comes up to me wide-eyed and says "Meredith! I read your blog!" I usually feel the need to 1) apologize for any brain damage I've inflicted, 2) say you're welcome for simply expressing what others were thinking. Its quite the dilemma. But I am always flattered and sometimes even amazed by my audience. You people are slightly nuts.
Slightly... ;)
Before I finish, another birthday is among us.
My dear friend of 17 years and college roommate, Liz, turns 30 today. She's taught me so much about life, friendship, and what it means to be in the moment. There are some people who walk beside you in life, and there are others who will drag your sorry ass when you feel like cannot take another step. Let's just say she's pulled like a tow truck a few times, and I am forever grateful.
Happy Birthday my dear friend....
I was at a local country club training one of my golfers and an older man, (note I did not say OLD...my God, before I start getting emails), was sporting this shirt like a champ. I asked him if I could get a picture and you would have thought I asked for an autograph. It was great....pretty much made my day.
I think you simply get to a certain age when you wear what you want....fanny pack...light up sweaters...velcro...who cares.
I might bring back stirrup pants. They make complete sense except for the fact that the actual stirrups, which are the essence of the pants, pull the crotch down to the knees. After 5 steps I'm not trying to walk around with half a foot worth of extra material between my legs.
Mini fashion nightmare, and yet made sense in 1987. But so did shoulder pads and the Eurythmics.
Enough said.
Wednesday night was my dear friend Jill's 60th birthday party, and I think I laughed until I cried nearly all night. It was an ovaries-only party, so of course the conversation was entertaining and generally circled the topic of men, menopause, and everything in between. I had an absolute blast.
Several of them joked that I was the youngest there and a trooper for hanging out with these ladies. Are you kidding?! I am pretty much a menopausal 29 year old....I go to bed well before all of them and at any given moment am about 3 ounces of water away from needing Depends.
It was my pleasure to be amongst them for the evening.
Not going to lie though,...to wake up at 4 and make it until 11pm that night was a feat in itself. I should not be held accountable for what came out of my mouth post-8pm. I typically reach a whole new level of ridiculous.
When someone comes up to me wide-eyed and says "Meredith! I read your blog!" I usually feel the need to 1) apologize for any brain damage I've inflicted, 2) say you're welcome for simply expressing what others were thinking. Its quite the dilemma. But I am always flattered and sometimes even amazed by my audience. You people are slightly nuts.
Slightly... ;)
Before I finish, another birthday is among us.
My dear friend of 17 years and college roommate, Liz, turns 30 today. She's taught me so much about life, friendship, and what it means to be in the moment. There are some people who walk beside you in life, and there are others who will drag your sorry ass when you feel like cannot take another step. Let's just say she's pulled like a tow truck a few times, and I am forever grateful.
Happy Birthday my dear friend....
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
29 Going On 60
The questions people ask and the conversations I have on a daily basis never cease to amaze me.
From the never-ending Would You Rather? game Garrett and I play (ironically all parties lose every time if played correctly), to some of the off the wall conversation starters presented by oxygen deprived clients. I am constantly entertained.
Today was no exception.
I am literally walking out of the break room with my oatmeal in hand, when a young woman looked at me with that I'm-about-to-ask-you-a-personal-question smirk. At that point I'm pretty much bracing myself for anything, but the topic of Brazilian waxing experiences didn't cross my mind. Apparently, she's become a regular and asked me if I'd ever go again.
I think it took me literally 0.35 seconds to answer.
I'd rather take a roundhouse kick to the face.
Absolutely nothing about that process made me pause and think "ya know what, I want to experience this again....in fact, once a month sounds awesome." Actually, it was borderline torture. There's a reason parties do not involve hot wax and private parts.
Its not fun.
Ever.
Next time I want second degree burns I'll opt for the McDonald's-coffee-to-the-crotch method...worked nicely in 1994. Worth a shot.
This was all before 10am. What a day.
Workout today was exhausting, but solid. I had the day off from cardio, which is always a plus in my book. Tomorrow is all cardio....happy hump day to me.
** A pat on the back to a client who ran a 5k this weekend and wanted to break 21 minutes.
Oh he broke it.
19:07...best run he's had in years. Very cool!
Its going to be a long day ahead tomorrow. I've got a full work day followed by a 60th birthday party for a dear friend and client. Where did the time go?
For the record, when I turn 60 my party will need to be before 3pm. At that point in my life I'll be headed to bed around 6, and 3:00 will honestly be pushing the limit of my prime during daylight.
I will be a handful to say the least.
Brace yourself.
From the never-ending Would You Rather? game Garrett and I play (ironically all parties lose every time if played correctly), to some of the off the wall conversation starters presented by oxygen deprived clients. I am constantly entertained.
Today was no exception.
I am literally walking out of the break room with my oatmeal in hand, when a young woman looked at me with that I'm-about-to-ask-you-a-personal-question smirk. At that point I'm pretty much bracing myself for anything, but the topic of Brazilian waxing experiences didn't cross my mind. Apparently, she's become a regular and asked me if I'd ever go again.
I think it took me literally 0.35 seconds to answer.
I'd rather take a roundhouse kick to the face.
Absolutely nothing about that process made me pause and think "ya know what, I want to experience this again....in fact, once a month sounds awesome." Actually, it was borderline torture. There's a reason parties do not involve hot wax and private parts.
Its not fun.
Ever.
Next time I want second degree burns I'll opt for the McDonald's-coffee-to-the-crotch method...worked nicely in 1994. Worth a shot.
This was all before 10am. What a day.
Workout today was exhausting, but solid. I had the day off from cardio, which is always a plus in my book. Tomorrow is all cardio....happy hump day to me.
** A pat on the back to a client who ran a 5k this weekend and wanted to break 21 minutes.
Oh he broke it.
19:07...best run he's had in years. Very cool!
Its going to be a long day ahead tomorrow. I've got a full work day followed by a 60th birthday party for a dear friend and client. Where did the time go?
For the record, when I turn 60 my party will need to be before 3pm. At that point in my life I'll be headed to bed around 6, and 3:00 will honestly be pushing the limit of my prime during daylight.
I will be a handful to say the least.
Brace yourself.
Monday, November 12, 2012
Keep Moving...Over.
Despite my make-up efforts, I looked tired all day. Haggard. Worn.
And when people say "Oh you look tired", its the nicest way of saying you look horrible and need to crawl in a hole. I get it.
That was me pretty much all day, and after a full 7 hours of sleep I have no excuse for my hit-by-a-truck look.
It was a typical Monday with many laughs and a random trip to Sam's Club thrown in there. Anytime I head somewhere during my break I am literally in my own sick version of a game-show. I run around the store like I've got 3 minutes to grab everything before the place implodes and I lose. People look at me like I'm crazy, and my response is to look at them in complete awe that humans can actually move that slow. I absolutely want everyone to enjoy their shopping experience, but enjoy it on one side of the aisle or the other. Not the middle. Choose a side. You've got about 10 feet to work with,...start a human dance train, do the hokey pokey, have a blast, but for the love of God don't move like an amoeba down the center.
Thank you.
Sincerely,
Everyone trying to get out of the store in less than 5 hours.
And on another slow note, I thought my cardio would never end today. It was just one of those days where every minute felt like 10. Don't kid yourself, of course I wanted to stop.
Overall, it was a great workout day, minus the never-ending treadmill run.
Talked to mom on the way home.
She was so excited to tell me she bought Christmas sprinkles today. I shouldn't act so shocked. Give her some puff paint and tinsel and she'll be entertained for hours. Throw some glitter in there and you'll be lucky to see her in the next 48 hours.
Gotta love that woman.
Ok, time for some sleep. I'll go ahead and apologize to my clients tomorrow because if I look as tired as I did today, you should get a discount.
Night folks!!
And when people say "Oh you look tired", its the nicest way of saying you look horrible and need to crawl in a hole. I get it.
That was me pretty much all day, and after a full 7 hours of sleep I have no excuse for my hit-by-a-truck look.
It was a typical Monday with many laughs and a random trip to Sam's Club thrown in there. Anytime I head somewhere during my break I am literally in my own sick version of a game-show. I run around the store like I've got 3 minutes to grab everything before the place implodes and I lose. People look at me like I'm crazy, and my response is to look at them in complete awe that humans can actually move that slow. I absolutely want everyone to enjoy their shopping experience, but enjoy it on one side of the aisle or the other. Not the middle. Choose a side. You've got about 10 feet to work with,...start a human dance train, do the hokey pokey, have a blast, but for the love of God don't move like an amoeba down the center.
Thank you.
Sincerely,
Everyone trying to get out of the store in less than 5 hours.
And on another slow note, I thought my cardio would never end today. It was just one of those days where every minute felt like 10. Don't kid yourself, of course I wanted to stop.
Overall, it was a great workout day, minus the never-ending treadmill run.
Talked to mom on the way home.
She was so excited to tell me she bought Christmas sprinkles today. I shouldn't act so shocked. Give her some puff paint and tinsel and she'll be entertained for hours. Throw some glitter in there and you'll be lucky to see her in the next 48 hours.
Gotta love that woman.
Ok, time for some sleep. I'll go ahead and apologize to my clients tomorrow because if I look as tired as I did today, you should get a discount.
Night folks!!
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Busted Pointer
I'm alive.
I honestly do not know where the last 5 days have gone, but somewhere between work, workouts, and waking up ready to roll at 3am, they seemed to have flown by. Its not that my social calendar is full, I promise. Nor has there been a lack of stories to tell. One day I need to wear a recorder and let the world listen in on a day-in-the-life-of...
It would be entertaining to say the least.
You'd probably yell "earmuffs!" about 37 times before noon.
And now some of you need to go watch that movie to know what the heck I'm talking about...
On a love note, my cousin got married this weekend, and I was in charge of make-up. My primary goal was to avoid anything that remotely looked like a hooker. That is a fine line when getting all dolled up for the big day.
If it were truly accurate, we'd all come down the aisle in no make-up, a pair of sweats, and our granny panties while our man stands at the alter biting his nails and adjusting himself in front of hundreds of people.
This is your future.
Welcome.
The wedding went smoothly, but count on my brothers and I to get a case of the giggles. Luckily, David was sitting in the back with the girls so it wasn't a complete family situation. My dad would have probably backhanded us all while mom cried shaking her head in disappoinment.
Wouldn't be the first time.
But we stayed as well-behaved as expected for this crowd.
Workouts have been great the last few days, and I am definitely ready to hit the weights tomorrow. I lifted a little bit today until I managed to nearly crush my right index finger on the bench.
Ridiculous.
I was adjusting the stupid thing with one hand and the next thing I knew it comes slamming down on my hand and I thought I was going to throw up. Not the workout ending I expected, but I was bleeding and pretty much wanted to lay in fetal position.
That always seems to be the go-to move for any kind of pain.....groin...finger...it doesn't matter.
I've still got a few emails to answer before bed...and a load of laundry to stare at, curse at, and then ultimately fold out of frustration. The excitement is overwhelming.
Have a great night folks. New week tomorrow. Game time.
I managed to nearly destroy my right index finger today. That was pretty eventful.
I honestly do not know where the last 5 days have gone, but somewhere between work, workouts, and waking up ready to roll at 3am, they seemed to have flown by. Its not that my social calendar is full, I promise. Nor has there been a lack of stories to tell. One day I need to wear a recorder and let the world listen in on a day-in-the-life-of...
It would be entertaining to say the least.
You'd probably yell "earmuffs!" about 37 times before noon.
And now some of you need to go watch that movie to know what the heck I'm talking about...
On a love note, my cousin got married this weekend, and I was in charge of make-up. My primary goal was to avoid anything that remotely looked like a hooker. That is a fine line when getting all dolled up for the big day.
If it were truly accurate, we'd all come down the aisle in no make-up, a pair of sweats, and our granny panties while our man stands at the alter biting his nails and adjusting himself in front of hundreds of people.
This is your future.
Welcome.
The wedding went smoothly, but count on my brothers and I to get a case of the giggles. Luckily, David was sitting in the back with the girls so it wasn't a complete family situation. My dad would have probably backhanded us all while mom cried shaking her head in disappoinment.
Wouldn't be the first time.
But we stayed as well-behaved as expected for this crowd.
Workouts have been great the last few days, and I am definitely ready to hit the weights tomorrow. I lifted a little bit today until I managed to nearly crush my right index finger on the bench.
Ridiculous.
I was adjusting the stupid thing with one hand and the next thing I knew it comes slamming down on my hand and I thought I was going to throw up. Not the workout ending I expected, but I was bleeding and pretty much wanted to lay in fetal position.
That always seems to be the go-to move for any kind of pain.....groin...finger...it doesn't matter.
I've still got a few emails to answer before bed...and a load of laundry to stare at, curse at, and then ultimately fold out of frustration. The excitement is overwhelming.
Have a great night folks. New week tomorrow. Game time.
I managed to nearly destroy my right index finger today. That was pretty eventful.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Soaring Eagle
If there was a move to bust this morning, I pretty much busted it.
Every song on Pandora sent me back to my prime, (a few short lived years in the early 00's), and next thing I know I'm whipping out moves that should probably stay away from public arenas before 10am. I couldn't help myself.
I had great music.
I had spandex.
It was game on at that point.
Tuesday workouts are proving to be a huge kick in the rear. Between my delts and glutes everything was aching and I was honestly glad to be finished.
Its that time of year when I need to sit down and reassess my own fitness goals. I don't like heading into the holidays without a plan because before I know it its a new year and I'm sitting there bloated and frustrated with my lack of planning. Its a mini-nightmare for my OCD...
* * *
I like to think that over the course of working with clients, they actually start to learn certain moves, the official names, muscle groups, etc...
I mean my God, some people could probably instruct a "squat" in their sleep because they've heard me say it a thousand times. And if I had a dollar every time I had to look at a backside and tell it to get lower I could have retired 4 years ago.
I literally look at butt all day.
Try not to be too envious.
So today I was working with one particular client I've had now for 3 years, and we'd just finished up a combination set of lunge jumps and lateral dumbbell raises. He sits down on the bench sucking some wind and says "I like that one.....the spread-eagle one."
Uhhhh....come again??
I couldn't help but laugh and think that clearly his definition of "spread eagle" is different than mine, and NO WHERE in that routine was the version I was thinking of. He laughed when he realized we were obviously not on the same page, and clarified that he was referencing the lateral raises.
I shook my head and simply told him never to use that term around anyone in public when describing the exercises I have him do. Ha.
Never a dull moment...
Its not even 8:30 and I cannot keep my eyes open. Long day ahead and if my glutes hold up through cardio it will be amazing. Here we come hump day...
Every song on Pandora sent me back to my prime, (a few short lived years in the early 00's), and next thing I know I'm whipping out moves that should probably stay away from public arenas before 10am. I couldn't help myself.
I had great music.
I had spandex.
It was game on at that point.
Tuesday workouts are proving to be a huge kick in the rear. Between my delts and glutes everything was aching and I was honestly glad to be finished.
Its that time of year when I need to sit down and reassess my own fitness goals. I don't like heading into the holidays without a plan because before I know it its a new year and I'm sitting there bloated and frustrated with my lack of planning. Its a mini-nightmare for my OCD...
* * *
I like to think that over the course of working with clients, they actually start to learn certain moves, the official names, muscle groups, etc...
I mean my God, some people could probably instruct a "squat" in their sleep because they've heard me say it a thousand times. And if I had a dollar every time I had to look at a backside and tell it to get lower I could have retired 4 years ago.
I literally look at butt all day.
Try not to be too envious.
So today I was working with one particular client I've had now for 3 years, and we'd just finished up a combination set of lunge jumps and lateral dumbbell raises. He sits down on the bench sucking some wind and says "I like that one.....the spread-eagle one."
Uhhhh....come again??
I couldn't help but laugh and think that clearly his definition of "spread eagle" is different than mine, and NO WHERE in that routine was the version I was thinking of. He laughed when he realized we were obviously not on the same page, and clarified that he was referencing the lateral raises.
I shook my head and simply told him never to use that term around anyone in public when describing the exercises I have him do. Ha.
Never a dull moment...
Its not even 8:30 and I cannot keep my eyes open. Long day ahead and if my glutes hold up through cardio it will be amazing. Here we come hump day...
Monday, November 5, 2012
Santa, I Can Explain...
Monday grind.
It was back to a "normal" day at the gym....as normal as you can imagine.
After a long, busy weekend I felt as if I were thrown back in the game without a helmet...or cup...if I were to need one. Actually, life is a mess...everyone needs one.
Strap in and hang on.
My weekend actually began on Friday as Kelly, mom, and I headed to Greensboro for the Holiday Market....5 hours of shopping in the coliseum. It was unreal....women breaking out the horrible Christmas sweaters, taste-testing every kind of peanut known to man, buying at least 3 things for myself before I spent on anyone else....the usual.
Sparkles got to meet Santa.
Pretty much the second best day of her life.
First being June 29, 1983. (Assumed, not fact).
Needless to say, she was loving every second of it. Moth to a flame. I swear I think she squealed a few times. Yes, my mom squeals. Let's not talk about it.
We had an absolute blast, capped it off with a gals-night dinner, and then it was full-force into a busy 2 days ahead.
Saturday was Susie's big day on the stage.
I made it out back to Greensboro for the prejudging, and was thrilled with her presentation. She walked out with confidence, nailed her poses, and I truly think felt good about everything. As I watched of course my mind drifted back to my last few competitions, the stress, and all that it entails. It is no small endeavor, and pretty much consumes every aspect of your lifestyle. And I think people are often amazed by how much it effects them mentally throughout the entire process. You're essentially subjecting yourself to a panel of opinions,....so effort off the stage does not determine the winner. There is no direct correlation. You give it your best and that's it. Some people have more of an edge than others.
If there's one thing I try to reiterate to competitors its that ultimately they cannot step on that stage seeking some sort of validation. You must be confident in your preparation, and understand that its a subjective competition.
Easier said than done, I know.
At the end of the day, I was beyond proud of Susie for all that she's put in over the last 5 months. Now its back to the drawing board and setting new goals...
On a random holiday note,....my tree is up and decorated.
Boom.
Go ahead and hate a little bit. When I informed my best friend of this, I was quickly met with disgust. I would expect nothing less...
Oscar doesn't know what in the heck is going on, but he will marinate under that tree like a honeybaked ham. That feline loves it.
8:30...I will be in bed in 20 minutes. Happy Monday to me.
Night folks!
It was back to a "normal" day at the gym....as normal as you can imagine.
After a long, busy weekend I felt as if I were thrown back in the game without a helmet...or cup...if I were to need one. Actually, life is a mess...everyone needs one.
Strap in and hang on.
My weekend actually began on Friday as Kelly, mom, and I headed to Greensboro for the Holiday Market....5 hours of shopping in the coliseum. It was unreal....women breaking out the horrible Christmas sweaters, taste-testing every kind of peanut known to man, buying at least 3 things for myself before I spent on anyone else....the usual.
Sparkles got to meet Santa.
Pretty much the second best day of her life.
First being June 29, 1983. (Assumed, not fact).
Needless to say, she was loving every second of it. Moth to a flame. I swear I think she squealed a few times. Yes, my mom squeals. Let's not talk about it.
Saturday was Susie's big day on the stage.
I made it out back to Greensboro for the prejudging, and was thrilled with her presentation. She walked out with confidence, nailed her poses, and I truly think felt good about everything. As I watched of course my mind drifted back to my last few competitions, the stress, and all that it entails. It is no small endeavor, and pretty much consumes every aspect of your lifestyle. And I think people are often amazed by how much it effects them mentally throughout the entire process. You're essentially subjecting yourself to a panel of opinions,....so effort off the stage does not determine the winner. There is no direct correlation. You give it your best and that's it. Some people have more of an edge than others.
If there's one thing I try to reiterate to competitors its that ultimately they cannot step on that stage seeking some sort of validation. You must be confident in your preparation, and understand that its a subjective competition.
Easier said than done, I know.
At the end of the day, I was beyond proud of Susie for all that she's put in over the last 5 months. Now its back to the drawing board and setting new goals...
On a random holiday note,....my tree is up and decorated.
Boom.
Go ahead and hate a little bit. When I informed my best friend of this, I was quickly met with disgust. I would expect nothing less...
Oscar doesn't know what in the heck is going on, but he will marinate under that tree like a honeybaked ham. That feline loves it.
8:30...I will be in bed in 20 minutes. Happy Monday to me.
Night folks!
Friday, November 2, 2012
Showtime
I'm not sure what it is about Friday mornings now, but I am pretty much incapable of sleeping past 4am. I've been up since 3. My brain started rolling through my "to-do" list of emails as if I was on speed. Its beyond absurd. I need sleep, and yet there I was sucking down my first cup of coffee by 3:30.
The only other people up at this time are drunk college kids and menopausal women with insomnia.
Not sure where I fit in that spectrum.
I've reached a new low.
The bright side of this is that I've already cleaned my house. But let's be honest, no one can completely appreciate a clean house before 9am because they're too in awe of the fact that you've been up for the past 6 hours and actually think you're an idiot.
Its fine, I get it.
I look like I got hit by a bus.
Happy Friday.
On a much more positive note, I had an AWESOME day of work yesterday.
I had a couple of new golfers, and it absolutely makes my day to watch someone genuinely have a motivating, eye-opening experience in the gym.
It fuels me.
This one particular man has dealt with back pain and tightness while playing for years, and all he wanted was to feel better, stronger, and actually enjoy the game he loved. It was almost as if he'd resigned himself to the notion that with age comes chronic pain and discomfort during EVERY activity. Very defeating notion to adopt.
We went over posture issues, core positioning, etc and 15 minutes later here was a nearly 70 year old man doing a straight leg deadlift pain-free in perfect form. He felt great and like an absolute success after that hour.
That truly made my day and left me pretty darn fired up. Dangerous.
That led me into my workout, which was a stark contrast to last Thursday's lifting session. I felt great....awake, strong, and not completely ready to bang my head against the wall during cardio. Overall, great day in the gym.
Busy weekend ahead.
One of my clients has her first Figure competition on Saturday, so I am headed to that in Greensboro. She's excited, tired, anxious, pumped,...all of the above. Its been a long and yet short 5 months of workout/nutrition preparation all leading up to this day. But she is ready. In her moments of anxiety, I was reminded of my life in the midst of one competition prep right after another....what a roller coaster.
Yes, I loved the stage. But there are times when the constant self-critique and fear of "not being good enough" was strong enough to nearly break you.
I totally get it.
I've enjoyed being on this side of competing this go-round.
So here we go Susie.
Game time. :)
Well, hell, its not even 7am. What to do....what to do....
Have a great Friday folks!
The only other people up at this time are drunk college kids and menopausal women with insomnia.
Not sure where I fit in that spectrum.
I've reached a new low.
The bright side of this is that I've already cleaned my house. But let's be honest, no one can completely appreciate a clean house before 9am because they're too in awe of the fact that you've been up for the past 6 hours and actually think you're an idiot.
Its fine, I get it.
I look like I got hit by a bus.
Happy Friday.
On a much more positive note, I had an AWESOME day of work yesterday.
I had a couple of new golfers, and it absolutely makes my day to watch someone genuinely have a motivating, eye-opening experience in the gym.
It fuels me.
This one particular man has dealt with back pain and tightness while playing for years, and all he wanted was to feel better, stronger, and actually enjoy the game he loved. It was almost as if he'd resigned himself to the notion that with age comes chronic pain and discomfort during EVERY activity. Very defeating notion to adopt.
We went over posture issues, core positioning, etc and 15 minutes later here was a nearly 70 year old man doing a straight leg deadlift pain-free in perfect form. He felt great and like an absolute success after that hour.
That truly made my day and left me pretty darn fired up. Dangerous.
That led me into my workout, which was a stark contrast to last Thursday's lifting session. I felt great....awake, strong, and not completely ready to bang my head against the wall during cardio. Overall, great day in the gym.
Busy weekend ahead.
One of my clients has her first Figure competition on Saturday, so I am headed to that in Greensboro. She's excited, tired, anxious, pumped,...all of the above. Its been a long and yet short 5 months of workout/nutrition preparation all leading up to this day. But she is ready. In her moments of anxiety, I was reminded of my life in the midst of one competition prep right after another....what a roller coaster.
Yes, I loved the stage. But there are times when the constant self-critique and fear of "not being good enough" was strong enough to nearly break you.
I totally get it.
I've enjoyed being on this side of competing this go-round.
So here we go Susie.
Game time. :)
Well, hell, its not even 7am. What to do....what to do....
Have a great Friday folks!
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Blame the Astro...
A total of 32 ounces of coffee before 9am.
I have nothing to say for myself except that I loved every minute of it.
I knew it was going to be one of those strap-your-mouth-to-the-travel-mug kind of mornings when I woke up face down in my pillow freezing and uncertain what day it was or where I was for that matter. Thus, I grabbed life by the horns, thumbs, and any other available body part, and saddled in for a long day...
Ironically, (or not), my day ended with me losing my mind to an Astro van in the middle of the Lowes Foods parking lot. It was after 3pm,...Mildred could have been intoxicated...which would be the only explanation of her blind-man-like driving skills.
Fittingly, I learned to drive in an Astro van.
Thank you mom.
Child abuse.
Today's workout ended up kicking me in the rear....hard.
Due to my schedule tomorrow and Thursday, I had to fit in more lifting than usual, and at the 60 minute mark, and 32 sets later, I was nowhere near done and completely drained. At those moments, I don't want to talk, I don't want encouragement, I just muster up every ounce of aggression I have, get borderline pissed off, and just finish. I can't explain it. Its simply how I operate. The whole positive-self-talk does not exist for me during my 5th set of lunge jumps...or on the first for that matter.
Needless to say, it was a long but GOOD workout.
I was glad to be done.
Well, tomorrow is Halloween.
I've never been crazy about the holiday, but I will dress up with the best of them. I was scrolling through some pictures and found this from junior year of college....remember Lara Croft Tomb Raider?...
That costume cost me exactly 2 dollars.
Sadly, I already owned every piece (including the black electrical tape), except for the water guns. Dollar store investment. Zero to badass for 2 bucks. Those were the days...
Tomorrow afternoon I will be dressed up, yes, and pictures will come soon...
Well, folks, have a great night, safe Halloween, and if you choose to eat an absurd amount of candy I have no sympathy for your stomach ache and meth-addict-like teeth. Hope its worth it.
I have nothing to say for myself except that I loved every minute of it.
I knew it was going to be one of those strap-your-mouth-to-the-travel-mug kind of mornings when I woke up face down in my pillow freezing and uncertain what day it was or where I was for that matter. Thus, I grabbed life by the horns, thumbs, and any other available body part, and saddled in for a long day...
Ironically, (or not), my day ended with me losing my mind to an Astro van in the middle of the Lowes Foods parking lot. It was after 3pm,...Mildred could have been intoxicated...which would be the only explanation of her blind-man-like driving skills.
Fittingly, I learned to drive in an Astro van.
Thank you mom.
Child abuse.
Today's workout ended up kicking me in the rear....hard.
Due to my schedule tomorrow and Thursday, I had to fit in more lifting than usual, and at the 60 minute mark, and 32 sets later, I was nowhere near done and completely drained. At those moments, I don't want to talk, I don't want encouragement, I just muster up every ounce of aggression I have, get borderline pissed off, and just finish. I can't explain it. Its simply how I operate. The whole positive-self-talk does not exist for me during my 5th set of lunge jumps...or on the first for that matter.
Needless to say, it was a long but GOOD workout.
I was glad to be done.
Well, tomorrow is Halloween.
I've never been crazy about the holiday, but I will dress up with the best of them. I was scrolling through some pictures and found this from junior year of college....remember Lara Croft Tomb Raider?...
That costume cost me exactly 2 dollars.
Sadly, I already owned every piece (including the black electrical tape), except for the water guns. Dollar store investment. Zero to badass for 2 bucks. Those were the days...
Tomorrow afternoon I will be dressed up, yes, and pictures will come soon...
Well, folks, have a great night, safe Halloween, and if you choose to eat an absurd amount of candy I have no sympathy for your stomach ache and meth-addict-like teeth. Hope its worth it.
Monday, October 29, 2012
Mullet Wigs and A Cold Feline
My house is currently 64 degrees.
I'm cold.
The computer keys are cold.
Oscar's balled up like a doughnut knot probably wondering why we're so cheap not to turn on the heat. I refuse to justify myself to a feline that licks questionable body parts, but I truly have no excuse for not heating this place up.
Until then, I will sit here and marinate in my hoodie like a champ.
What a weekend.
I spent the majority of my weekend in front of a computer mulling through emails and diet plans,...2 seconds away from doing some serious interventions. If I show up at your door with a trash bag, bottle of laxatives, and 12 step program, don't ask questions just go with it.
The crap people eat still blows my mind sometimes. Not to say we should never enjoy a splurge every now and then, but my god people, the majority of your food should actually start rotting within a few weeks at most. Real food.
Needless to say, after the first 3 meal plans, I wanted to bang a few heads against the wall. I refrained. But today it was game time for those people.
Speaking of food, I literally choked on my chicken today.
It was about 5:00, and I was predictably throwing down my chicken and veggies as I made my way around the gym. (Gotta fuel the machine on the fly). Next thing I know, I'm coughing like an asthmatic, can hardly breathe, and Garrett's looking at me like I better figure it out. He reassures me he knows the Heimlich, but I'm sure that while he'd dislodge the chicken, he'd also break my sternum...
So there I was trying to hack this white meat up, with my hands in the air having an afternoon near-death experience. It was like my own sick game of charades, and I was apparently "Dying on Space Mountain."
It was the only time I cursed chicken.
Well, except for the last time I choked...
Damn bird.
On a much more positive note, Zimm stopped by today! They had to evacuate Christopher Newport because of the hurricane, so he traveled with the GF to come home for a few days.
Great to catch up, and many laughs....always a good thing on a Monday.
Safe travels back Zimm :)
Well, I am still getting my halloween costume plan together, so I called my mom to ask for a wig or two. To add to the colorful portrait of my mom, just know that she has a designated "costume box" at home....which ic actually more like a closet.
I kid you not. If you need a prop, she's got it.....sad, on many levels.
She starts listing off all these wig options from Dolly Pardon to a mullet, which I immediately wanted of course, but I was overwhelmed after the 6th one. All I could do was picture her running around in these wigs on a Saturday night with a handful of glitter singing "If You're Happy and You Know It".
I'd pay to see it.
I'd go so far as to encourage her to strap on the fanny pack to complete the ensemble.
That pretty much wraps up my day.
Dad is dropping off 2 wigs for me tomorrow.....this is what a retired man does. I don't question it. Let him roll.
Night folks...
I'm cold.
The computer keys are cold.
Oscar's balled up like a doughnut knot probably wondering why we're so cheap not to turn on the heat. I refuse to justify myself to a feline that licks questionable body parts, but I truly have no excuse for not heating this place up.
Until then, I will sit here and marinate in my hoodie like a champ.
What a weekend.
I spent the majority of my weekend in front of a computer mulling through emails and diet plans,...2 seconds away from doing some serious interventions. If I show up at your door with a trash bag, bottle of laxatives, and 12 step program, don't ask questions just go with it.
The crap people eat still blows my mind sometimes. Not to say we should never enjoy a splurge every now and then, but my god people, the majority of your food should actually start rotting within a few weeks at most. Real food.
Needless to say, after the first 3 meal plans, I wanted to bang a few heads against the wall. I refrained. But today it was game time for those people.
Speaking of food, I literally choked on my chicken today.
It was about 5:00, and I was predictably throwing down my chicken and veggies as I made my way around the gym. (Gotta fuel the machine on the fly). Next thing I know, I'm coughing like an asthmatic, can hardly breathe, and Garrett's looking at me like I better figure it out. He reassures me he knows the Heimlich, but I'm sure that while he'd dislodge the chicken, he'd also break my sternum...
So there I was trying to hack this white meat up, with my hands in the air having an afternoon near-death experience. It was like my own sick game of charades, and I was apparently "Dying on Space Mountain."
It was the only time I cursed chicken.
Well, except for the last time I choked...
Damn bird.
On a much more positive note, Zimm stopped by today! They had to evacuate Christopher Newport because of the hurricane, so he traveled with the GF to come home for a few days.
Great to catch up, and many laughs....always a good thing on a Monday.
Safe travels back Zimm :)
Well, I am still getting my halloween costume plan together, so I called my mom to ask for a wig or two. To add to the colorful portrait of my mom, just know that she has a designated "costume box" at home....which ic actually more like a closet.
I kid you not. If you need a prop, she's got it.....sad, on many levels.
She starts listing off all these wig options from Dolly Pardon to a mullet, which I immediately wanted of course, but I was overwhelmed after the 6th one. All I could do was picture her running around in these wigs on a Saturday night with a handful of glitter singing "If You're Happy and You Know It".
I'd pay to see it.
I'd go so far as to encourage her to strap on the fanny pack to complete the ensemble.
That pretty much wraps up my day.
Dad is dropping off 2 wigs for me tomorrow.....this is what a retired man does. I don't question it. Let him roll.
Night folks...
Friday, October 26, 2012
Way Too Early...
6:30am. I've been up for 3 hours. Ridiculous.
I was completely exhausted last night and the thought of sleeping in past 4:15 sounded amazing. So much for that.
I woke up at 3:30 and my mind was racing.
Emails I needed to get out, stuff I needed to do,...on and on. It was absurd, and next thing I know Oscar is whining at the door for food. He acts like he hasn't eaten in 3 days.
Clearly he has.
My God, the joker is practically pulling a muscle trying to run up the stairs. No, he's not limping, he's just fat and I have no sympathy for a 3am meow mix craving.
This week has honestly flown by.
I've got new clients ready to roll and doing a diet overhaul during the next several days.
When I initially have them keep a food journal I think its eye-opening in itself for them to see what's going in their mouth. Our notion of "food" is so screwed up its ridiculous. Just because its edible in the sense that it won't instantly kill you upon ingestion, doesn't make it a true food. Processed foods should honestly be a minority in your diet. From a health standpoint, our bodies were not meant to process all these chemicals, additives, and ungodly amount of sugar. It amazing peoples' pancreas doesn't explode on a regular basis...
However, I do find that many females have this horrible, yet popular notion that to lose weight they must be hungry all the time. That couldn't be further from the truth and is basically counterproductive. Fact: Your body needs a certain amount of calories to function and carry out bodily processes. Anything you burn on top of that in regards to lifestyle/workout accounts for your total daily energy expenditure. If you cut calories TOO low below that point, your body will actually hold onto fat because it senses that food/energy is scarce and seeks to conserve energy. Thus, your metabolism slows, and your body opts to sacrifice hard earned muscle instead of fat because muscle utilizes more calories to function than fat does. The body is all about survival and homeostasis. Anything that jeopardizes that, like extreme low-calorie dieting, puts the body into a conservation state. STOP STARVING. You have to eat to lose.
I've got about 5 meal plans to get together before Sunday, and some of them make me want to scream through the computer. I literally feel their insides cringing.
So on that note, take a look at the MAJORITY of your food choices. Are they real food or packaged crap that could last on a shelf for a solid 14 months due to massive amounts of chemicals? And if you're trying to lose weight and about to claw out your eyes because you're so hungry, time to actually feed your body and lose fat at the same time. It can be done, I promise!
Friday morning and I'm already fired up...
Well, seeing as how I've been up for almost 4 hours, its time to fold some laundry and start on another project. This weekend will be busy in that regard. I've got about a week to get my house in order before I decorate for Christmas.
That's right. The tree will be up and my house will be a fire hazard in less than 8 days. Slightly obsessed with the most wonderful time of the year...slightly....
Tomorrow is my little brother's birthday. Hard to believe he turns 25.
Seems like just yesterday he was toting around Big Bird sucking his thumb like a champ. Hell, it literally might have been yesterday,...kid's crazy...
Happy Birthday Bud, love you! :)
I was completely exhausted last night and the thought of sleeping in past 4:15 sounded amazing. So much for that.
I woke up at 3:30 and my mind was racing.
Emails I needed to get out, stuff I needed to do,...on and on. It was absurd, and next thing I know Oscar is whining at the door for food. He acts like he hasn't eaten in 3 days.
Clearly he has.
My God, the joker is practically pulling a muscle trying to run up the stairs. No, he's not limping, he's just fat and I have no sympathy for a 3am meow mix craving.
This week has honestly flown by.
I've got new clients ready to roll and doing a diet overhaul during the next several days.
When I initially have them keep a food journal I think its eye-opening in itself for them to see what's going in their mouth. Our notion of "food" is so screwed up its ridiculous. Just because its edible in the sense that it won't instantly kill you upon ingestion, doesn't make it a true food. Processed foods should honestly be a minority in your diet. From a health standpoint, our bodies were not meant to process all these chemicals, additives, and ungodly amount of sugar. It amazing peoples' pancreas doesn't explode on a regular basis...
However, I do find that many females have this horrible, yet popular notion that to lose weight they must be hungry all the time. That couldn't be further from the truth and is basically counterproductive. Fact: Your body needs a certain amount of calories to function and carry out bodily processes. Anything you burn on top of that in regards to lifestyle/workout accounts for your total daily energy expenditure. If you cut calories TOO low below that point, your body will actually hold onto fat because it senses that food/energy is scarce and seeks to conserve energy. Thus, your metabolism slows, and your body opts to sacrifice hard earned muscle instead of fat because muscle utilizes more calories to function than fat does. The body is all about survival and homeostasis. Anything that jeopardizes that, like extreme low-calorie dieting, puts the body into a conservation state. STOP STARVING. You have to eat to lose.
I've got about 5 meal plans to get together before Sunday, and some of them make me want to scream through the computer. I literally feel their insides cringing.
So on that note, take a look at the MAJORITY of your food choices. Are they real food or packaged crap that could last on a shelf for a solid 14 months due to massive amounts of chemicals? And if you're trying to lose weight and about to claw out your eyes because you're so hungry, time to actually feed your body and lose fat at the same time. It can be done, I promise!
Friday morning and I'm already fired up...
Well, seeing as how I've been up for almost 4 hours, its time to fold some laundry and start on another project. This weekend will be busy in that regard. I've got about a week to get my house in order before I decorate for Christmas.
That's right. The tree will be up and my house will be a fire hazard in less than 8 days. Slightly obsessed with the most wonderful time of the year...slightly....
Tomorrow is my little brother's birthday. Hard to believe he turns 25.
Seems like just yesterday he was toting around Big Bird sucking his thumb like a champ. Hell, it literally might have been yesterday,...kid's crazy...
Happy Birthday Bud, love you! :)
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Meat Department Math Magician
First time in awhile that I've sat down for dinner before 8.
I've got fish, squash, and some jazz music.
This is my life.
Try not to be envious.
I went to the store and told the guy I wanted a 5oz cut of salmon.
He cuts a piece, places it on the scale and it reads 0.69lb and asks "Is that close enough?" I'm no math major, but wow, not even close. And this is why you don't facilitate prescription drug dosage. You would have just killed someone.
Just bag it. I'll grab 5 loaves on the way out and have my own reenactment of Jesus feeding the multitude.
Thanks.
Magic Mike was released on DVD today, and I am ashamed to report that I did not obtain a copy. Yes, I failed at my main Tuesday goal. Unbelievable.
With extended scenes and a duo blue ray/dvd pack, I should have been waiting at the door before dawn.
Tomorrow...
I knew my workout today was going to be brutal. I was exhausted, and had to hit shoulders, glutes, and biceps in one day. Might as well punch me in the throat. It was a loooong 90 minutes to say the least, but for whatever reason I often find I had some of my best workouts when I'm tired. No, this isn't always the case, but it happens at least once a week. I think part of it is the fact that I am forced to work that much harder to focus and push, so I leave no room for wasting time or energy dreading it. Hey, you got to go with whatever works. Half the battle is starting. And boy was I glad to be done.
Tomorrow is just cardio and core. Actually looking forward to it....write that down...
I had quite a few people mention the Lance post yesterday.
Many people questioned what was "true athletic ability" and what was "result of doping". There is no denying his athletic ability. Drugs/doping cannot make you an athlete. Period. You can't inject steroids into a 300lb lineman, and suddenly expect him to have the speed and agility of a cornerback. Not going to happen. Drugs and any form of "doping" for athletic purposes is more about recovery and a muscle's capacity to grow and endure high training volumes. The quicker you can recover, the more you can train, the stronger you get, and the cycle continues....every pun intended.
I think what should be more upsetting than a professional athlete's choice to engage in such practices (and then deny it), is the fact that we constantly elevate them to an untouchable status. What I mean is, we will not only justify their actions on one hand to ultimately fulfill this ideal image we've created to admire and aspire to, but on the other hand we will burn them at the stake for decisions we mistakenly thought they were never capable of.
On many levels its a little twisted.
On that note its time for some shut-eye. Hope everyone has a productive hump day ahead of them. Night folks!
I've got fish, squash, and some jazz music.
This is my life.
Try not to be envious.
I went to the store and told the guy I wanted a 5oz cut of salmon.
He cuts a piece, places it on the scale and it reads 0.69lb and asks "Is that close enough?" I'm no math major, but wow, not even close. And this is why you don't facilitate prescription drug dosage. You would have just killed someone.
Just bag it. I'll grab 5 loaves on the way out and have my own reenactment of Jesus feeding the multitude.
Thanks.
Magic Mike was released on DVD today, and I am ashamed to report that I did not obtain a copy. Yes, I failed at my main Tuesday goal. Unbelievable.
With extended scenes and a duo blue ray/dvd pack, I should have been waiting at the door before dawn.
Tomorrow...
I knew my workout today was going to be brutal. I was exhausted, and had to hit shoulders, glutes, and biceps in one day. Might as well punch me in the throat. It was a loooong 90 minutes to say the least, but for whatever reason I often find I had some of my best workouts when I'm tired. No, this isn't always the case, but it happens at least once a week. I think part of it is the fact that I am forced to work that much harder to focus and push, so I leave no room for wasting time or energy dreading it. Hey, you got to go with whatever works. Half the battle is starting. And boy was I glad to be done.
Tomorrow is just cardio and core. Actually looking forward to it....write that down...
I had quite a few people mention the Lance post yesterday.
Many people questioned what was "true athletic ability" and what was "result of doping". There is no denying his athletic ability. Drugs/doping cannot make you an athlete. Period. You can't inject steroids into a 300lb lineman, and suddenly expect him to have the speed and agility of a cornerback. Not going to happen. Drugs and any form of "doping" for athletic purposes is more about recovery and a muscle's capacity to grow and endure high training volumes. The quicker you can recover, the more you can train, the stronger you get, and the cycle continues....every pun intended.
I think what should be more upsetting than a professional athlete's choice to engage in such practices (and then deny it), is the fact that we constantly elevate them to an untouchable status. What I mean is, we will not only justify their actions on one hand to ultimately fulfill this ideal image we've created to admire and aspire to, but on the other hand we will burn them at the stake for decisions we mistakenly thought they were never capable of.
On many levels its a little twisted.
On that note its time for some shut-eye. Hope everyone has a productive hump day ahead of them. Night folks!
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