Tears and Beers...

6 days until New York.

The reality of the change ahead has yet to hit me. 
Despite the fact that I've cried with numerous clients over the last 2 weeks, I still predict I'll wake up on October 3rd in my 400sq ft box and think holy crap...
Silver lining: the walk to the coffee went from 75 steps to 4.  Its the little things.

No, I am not fully packed.  I gutted by closet of 6 garbage bags full of clothes, and still managed to fill several large boxes to take with me.  What a hoarder....I judge myself....(for about 2 seconds, lets be honest).
And the apartment situation has been a roller coaster to say the least.  I may be sleeping on a treadmill at the gym...or floor.  Not the first time.
Its been applications, fees, forms, money, and practically sending a urine sample to get approved. 
I have no shame, I would have overnighted it in a zip-lock.  
Thank God for my broker.  I think we've become best friends in the last 2 weeks, and constantly joke about going out for drinks once this ordeal is over.  Only, after 6 hours worth of texts, emails, and phone calls on Saturday, we are no longer kidding.  The day I arrive you will find us sitting side by side on bar stools, exhausted, and serenading each other to Journey ballads.
I owe him a shot.
And maybe a kidney.

Ah Gary,...thank you my dear friend...

Yes, its been an emotional week/weeks.  Friday night was my Send-off party hosted at a clients' house, and all day I'd reminisced on my 9+ years at ActivEdge.  I jokingly told them I know they came just to watch their trainer drink booze and cry....hello normal Friday night.
Kidding.
I like to save the tears for Saturday morning.  Spread them out.  Enjoy them.
Ok, that's an exaggeration too.  I can't formulate tears in the morning.  I'm a zombie in need of caffeine and anxiety meds.  The only time I may let them flow is if either of those things suddenly vanishes at 4am.
In that case, you will see me on the news...

In all seriousness, I was absolutely floored by the love, encouragement, and kind words of those who came.  There is no way I can truly articulate my appreciation.
I am grateful for those transparent moments.
...for the opportunity to push and empower souls.
...for those who allowed me to pull them away from themselves, and direct them forward into the unknown.
...for the laughs, tears, and victories accomplished in the gym,...only to see them transcend beyond.
...for the inspiring stories that push me, and call forth my best as a trainer, friend, daughter, sister, aunt, etc
I could go on.
What I have learned in my time at ActivEdge drives me.  It leaves me constantly assessing where I am and where I want to go.  The opportunity to reach an array of people and open their eyes to their own potential is, without a doubt, one of the greatest gifts.
I value this beyond words.
It is a venue for growth, change, and ultimately a renewed sense of self, strength, and ability to overcome.  For me to be a part of that, has certainly changed my own life and challenged me to seek improvement...daily.
Thank you.

Saying goodbye stings...its hard to step away from the journeys I've co-traveled for years and onto a foreign path.  But I remain grateful for the time we've shared and take what I've learned to the next chapter in NYC. 
Perhaps it is accurate to say I will leave with a heavy and yet fulfilled heart.  ActivEdge is a home to me.  A family, and remains a huge piece of who I am and where my story began....

Love.  You.  All.

A few pics from the party...

Answering My YES...

I swear, when I kill a fly barehanded you would think I just won at life. 
I fist pump,...point my finger at it and yell like a psychotic bully,...then I proceed to look around as if a crowd of cheers is about to erupt.  Its sad, and yet I feel like a ninja every time.
Every.  Single.  Time.
(I just had one of those moments and am currently still basking in my victory).

So FINALLY,...I can explain why I've been MIA for the last 2 weeks.  Its certainly not been a lack of entertaining moments in my life.  Every day is an adventure. 
I say that like I'm Peter Pan.  I'm not. 
However, I am a big fan of colorful spandex, flying, and adventure.
No, life is bringing new and exciting changes.
I've been traveling like a nomad the past few weeks, and I definitely had those moments of waking up forgetting what day it was, where I was, and if I was running late....to what exactly, I have no clue.  Nonetheless, I am here in one piece and functioning like a decent human being.

Long story short(er),...after 31 years in this area and 10 years at ActivEdge, I am leaving North Carolina.
Earlier this year I reached a point in my journey/career when something was off.  I was ready for "the next step", but couldn't quite pinpoint what that looked like.  Was it gym ownership?  Was it a move?  I wasn't quite sure.  I waited.
A few months later it hit me like a damn freight train.  New York.
I can't explain it, but it was a deep internal "yes" that kept growing and I couldn't ignore it.  I entertained other cities and every time something brought me back to New York.  And once I allowed myself to fully commit and make the decision, the ball started rolling,...and with extreme momentum.
Things were lining up and next thing I knew I was getting emails regarding my resume and setting up interviews.  I had to bite the bullet on airfare and simply trust that my needs would be met and must do this to go after what I wanted.  I knew was the right decision.
Believe me, there were moments when I wanted to cry...like when I missed my return flight on Wednesday and suddenly found myself yelling obscenities as if that would somehow get me home.  It didn't...but a fast cab driver and a record breaking sprint through airport #2 did.  But also, being overwhelmed and exhausted with traveling up for only 8 hours, getting 3 hours sleep before a 14 hour work day, selling a house, packing, blah blah blah.  Never a dull moment. 
But what was the other option right?  Ignore my calling and basically talk myself back into a comfort zone that ironically has no longer become just that??
Not an option.
I had to say "yes" to my "yes".

So here I am 3 weeks before my official move still arranging a place to live.  Ha.
I am thrilled to say that I accepted a job with Equinox on 54th and 2nd and am excited to join the team in October!....and yay for being able to wear all black to work each day.  (My clients are used to my ninja-esk attire)  ;)
I'm bringing 10 years experience and some southern love to my new home.  Yes, I was quickly made aware that my accent does exist and is evident in pretty much everything I say...
I make no apologies. 

If you told me last year at this time I'd be moving there it would have been grounds for defriending and possibly a panic attack.  Heck, it was just last year that I was awkwardly aboard the subway with a strangers crotch to my face.  Nothing says come-live-here like sex organs on the metro.
...And now here I am trying to figure out how to store over 160 pairs of shoes in a 500 sq ft apartment and justify sleeping in a twin bed.
Ok kidding, the twin bed is not happening....2 things I gave up after college: twin bed and poor life choices after 2am. 
Ok fine, one thing.
So New York,...brace yourself...

There will be much more to come.  Many thoughts and reflections as I say goodbye to some clients I have literally worked with for nearly 10 years.  I am already completely humbled by the kind words and support from so many of you. 
Thank you....I can't say it enough.  You are the reason I can do what I love and boldly pursue the next step...