Holiday Hangover...

I feel as though Christmas came, went, and now we're all doing the holiday walk of shame.
The last week was a whirlwind of work, holiday parties, and a few headaches that may or may not have been self-induced.  Yes, I tend to stress myself out....add a major holiday in there and you're practically pouring gas on the fire.
But I survived.
My Christmas morning started with a jog.  A cold ass jog.
It was 27 degrees when I left the house, and it literally took me 3 miles just to "warm-up" and remotely feel my face...sort of.  At that point the only reason I needed to be covered in dry-fit gear was in case I wet myself without knowing.
Yes, there was a 82% chance of that happening.  All I could think about was how cold I was...and how horrible it felt to start....and baby Jesus.  WWJD?? 
Not. This.
Not running in weather that begged for a snuggie, a couch, and Sleepless in Seattle.  If you hate that movie you are lying.  You love it.  Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks have been making out since the early 90's and every time its PG and its awesome.  Period.

Back to my Christmas,...
After I regained feeling in my face, and 7+ miles later, I was ready to face my day.  No pun intended.
I finished wrapping gifts and loaded the car to head to the Parker house.  My trunk was a Christmas nightmare...

Yes, I do the big bows.  I like it.  Its festive.
...And, well, I discovered a few years ago that Oscar is not intelligent enough to decipher thin ribbon from actual grass.
Idiot.
So I'm not trying to spend a holiday extracting ribbon from my cat's anus.  Been there.  Done that.  Still traumatized.

It was off to the Parker house later that day.
Of course Sparkles and her side kick were in rare holiday form...

Mom was so excited she couldn't stand it.
No she didn't take that hat off the entire night.
We had a blast between dinner, gifts, and the bakery that Payton and Haven were running to ensure we all had our fare share of sugar that night...

Their understanding of "sanitary" and "portion control" was slightly off.  Pretty sure I ate the cookie Payton licked in picture 1,...and left with diabetes from the sprinkle-infested cookie Haven constructed in picture 2...

What a night...
We opened gifts, laughed until it hurt, and had constant entertainment from all parties involved.  I laughed at my brother as I watched him open an old storage box from his childhood.  See, mom is at this stage in life where in an effort to clean out crap from their house, she cleverly disguises it as a sentimental Christmas gift....when in reality, its like a yardsale item you didn't want...topped with a bow...and a smile from mom...
No turning back.  You take it like a champ.
So I laughed at David until I opened my own.  Dammit.
It was full of old beanie babies (whoever invented those should drown in them), and writings from when I was younger.  I had a cricket journal, a portrait of myself that resembled ET, and a few stories about missing children.
Yeah,..slightly disturbing...
Thank you mom.
All I wanted for Christmas was clutter from my past.
Awesome.   When you hit my college years, you wrap up everything and burn it.

...I give her a hard time, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't save all that stuff and spend more than a few minutes laughing at my perspective on life at the age of 8.  The world was simply not ready...

Well, I am about to hit the bed and prepare for a few days of vacation...CRAZY.
I might live life on the edge and sleep until 7....whoa...easy killa.
I'll leave you with a few more Christmas pics...

Breast Milk and Coffee...

I won't even try and justify the amount of coffee I consumed today.
It was somewhere between too-much and illegal, but I was one head nod away from a face plant and saw no other way.
Thus, I refilled my mug more times than should probably be allowed in a 13 hour span.
And yes, I will still sleep like a baby.
Minus wetting the bed,....but none of us are above that at any age, so don't get cocky about it...

What a day.
To be the day before Christmas Eve, I was pretty impressed with folks' dedication to get in the gym.  Yes, there are a million excuses to come up with and endless holiday stuff to do, but at some point its about making the time.  Selfish or not, (totally perspective), its important.  Period.
And even if some of those who came did it simply to get out of the house to escape family guest, no judgement.  I was keeping you from either a panic attack or jail time. 
You're welcome.
Happy holidays.

It was a busy weekend with friends, some family, more friends, and coffee....with friends.  I say that like I have endless friends....I don't.  Only about 3 people actually claim that role in public.
I get it and don't blame them.
You strap on a helmet, pack the prozac, and pray for the best...

Friday night I got to spend with my dear college roommates and finally hold Blair's bundle of joy...what a stud...

....and then there's that strange moment when you're caught somewhere between "wow my friend has a baby!" and "holy crap give me 5 minutes with no filter and I just might corrupt this child"....
Actually, I was probably more concerned about having my friend's regurgitated breast milk anywhere near my face.
Yes, I think about these things and I can't explain it.
What a great night with the gals.

I would go on, but darn if I don't feel like I was hit by a bus...twice...
Beyond tired and an extremely busy morning ahead.  But THEN, its practically Christmas and a fun eve ahead...
Yes, I will have to take a nap and pound coffee at 5pm to stay up late, but my pre-game rituals are pretty solid at this point and work for this rapidly aging 30 year old...

Ah here we go Tuesday....

Trophies Over Twinkies

Ever have those weeks when your hygiene is questionable and for a second feel as though you're reliving college dorm days and don't really care if the socks you put on are matching/clean or neither?
Yeah, I'm marinating in one of those weeks and its only Tuesday.
Not sure which is worse,...that I wore dirty workout clothes 2 days in a row, or that it doesn't bother me as much as it probably should..?..
And by dirty I don't mean that I wore clean bikers on Monday and then the same ones on Tuesday.  I mean I forgot to wash clothes on the weekend, realized this unfortunate fact Monday morning at 4am, dug through the dirty hamper to find bikers that were most likely worn Friday or Saturday, (insert judgement here), then repeated the steps this morning.
Maybe its my way of conserving water,....yeah ok, no....its me resorting back to high school tendencies of not washing my uniform simply because it required more effort than I was willing to give.
Guilty.
Clothes are currently in the washing machine.  Any longer in that lifestyle and I'd have to confess to Sparkles she apparently did a horrible job teaching me personal hygiene. 
...Nailed the birds and the bees talk, but only sub-par on the not-wearing-sweaty-clothes-and-smelling-like-rancid-foot tutorial...

Workouts have been great lately, but I can tell my legs are fatigued.  Jogging feels borderline-horrible at times because my legs feel so heavy.  Just tired. 
Understandable....they are currently engaging in an intense competition with my teeth as to who can be whiter.  Its apparently exhausting.
Gotta love this time of year when you're pale, cold, and thus 2 main reasons to avoid nudity all together.
I get it.

On an editable note...
...Had some interesting conversations with clients today about nutrition and the 'ol why we eat the way we do theme.  Its eye opening to hear and watch people slowly unravel the tangled and twisted relationship they have with food.  BUT, what a huge step for them personally.  The more we understand the why, the better equipped we are to successfully implement strategies to move forward.  I'd venture to say that one of the biggest issues is using food as some type of reward.  Yes, we've all done it, but the key is not to live by it.
You are not a dog.  Thus, food is not a reward.
When we place food in that category mentally, we are ultimately saying either we "deserve it" or "don't deserve it".  That is simply not the case.  Furthermore, the "reward" foods are more often than not some type of processed garbage we'd otherwise label as unhealthy,...so there lies another problem: we consciously and subconsciously tell ourselves that "rewarding food" or food that is "deserved" is not the same as what we'd normally label as beneficial, healthy, or helping us achieve our goals.
So then we're left standing there in the kitchen cursing even the desire to want what we shouldn't.
Sad,...and yet so common.
The question naturally arises "How do I fix it?"....ha, well, I wish it were easy.  And to some extent it sounds easy, but here's the key: You must change your MIND.  Ultimately, your perspective on food - its use, value, and benefits to you as a functioning human being must change for the habit/physical manifestation of an overarching self/food relationship to change. 
Its that simple, and yet that hard....I say hard because it does take daily practice and awareness to break the cycle of a certain way of thinking that 9 times out of 10 has existed for Y-E-A-R-S.
Be patient.  And by patient I mean get off your butt everyday and examine these things...move forward...dare to feel a hell of a lot better than you do now...
Yes, I could go on for pages about this....but I won't....mainly because I'll have carpal tunnel by the end...

Whew,...hump day here I come.

Former Fairy and Bipolar Drinking Disorder

What a weekend.
Finally got to see the sun today.  Thank.  God.
Yesterday was a meteorological nightmare...cold, rainy, 100% chance of showers and perhaps the same chance of tear shed in a snuggie and closet drinking by 4pm. 
What a gross day.
BUT, the weather was certainly off-set by the family Christmas gathering at my parents' house.  The laughter was pretty much non-stop, as was the ridiculousness.  Just as I sat down to eat, I hear this weird jingle noise and sure enough Sparkles is standing over my cousin and I with a salt shaker full of tiny bells.
I swear that woman was a fairy in her previous life.
At this point, you roll with it and just be thankful the thing isn't full of glitter, confetti, or anything else that could remotely cause temporary blindness and damage your cornea.

My weekend was packed with Christmas celebrations and what not.  It began Friday night at the bar for our annual ActivEdge Christmas party,....the irony of a gym party at the bar, I know.  The owner and his wife are former clients and we truly love to patronize their bar when we can.  (Dain's Place on 9th St!)
I walk in and within 3 minutes he randomly shows up with a shot of Jack and a glass of white wine....even at 30 you can't escape hazing.  And what a bipolar alcohol combination.  The wine says 30 years old and a sensible social drinker.  The shot of Jack says mouth of a sailor and potentially raised in a barn.
I can't really argue with either...I totally get it.
It explains a lot....A. Lot.

Nonetheless, I couldn't believe another year was basically behind us and I am headed into my 9th year with Brian and ActivEdge.  So crazy.
I remember when he first told me I should consider becoming a trainer and I thought he was crazy.  And now I wouldn't trade it for the world....(mainly because 6 billion people is overwhelming and there is no North Pole), but seriously I cannot imagine doing anything else.
So, a big thank you to Brian for allowing me the opportunity to do what I love every single day...

In other news, I am already looking ahead to 2014,...setting goals, organizing thoughts for my book, articles, and tid bits I'll have for you in the coming weeks/months.
My theme to start the year is INTENTION.
LIVE with INTENTION....in our careers, health, relationships....this idea of closing the gap between where we are in these areas of our life and where we want to be with purposeful, intentional daily steps towards our goals.  Because the truth is that once we are aware of the discrepancy between the two and remain aware through periodic assessment, our motivation to move forward continues to fuel itself.
...more to come on that dear friends...brace yourself for word vomit, a little "preaching", and a whole lot of tough love ;)

Well, I better hit the bed...Monday awaits and I better get my mind right...

Elderly F-bombs and My Sock Situation

If I had a dollar for every f-bomb dropped on me by 2pm, my retirement would look pretty darn good right now.
And its never who you'd think.  For the most part, my teenagers are good about it,...its the "older" crowd who needs to take a timeout with the Dial bar in the pie-hole.  Don't let them fool you.  Saturday afternoon they're running around with the grandkids cuddling and following that crazy nomad Dora, and come Monday morning they're unloading four letter words like a potty-mouth sniper.
It makes me laugh.
I love my job.

Since returning from NY its been a hectic week and the pile of laundry on my floor is basically taking over as I mull in my own filth.  And digging for matching socks at 4am is a recipe for an anxiety attack waiting to happen.  White with gold seam,...white with pink seam,...white with white seam,...black,..."Oh. My. God.  Why do you all non-matching cotton horribles hate me?!"....then I immediately find a match and walk in shame to the closet slowly regaining sanity...
Welcome to my morning.
Its wonderful.
I swear.

Its been a fairly normal week at the gym, and yes I use that term loosely because there is never a dull moment with all my peeps.  Laughter is underrated and I can honestly say there is never a shortage for me from 6am-7pm.  And yes, sometimes I laugh at you, not with you.  When someone says otherwise they are generally lying.  Shocking, I know.
On a more serious note though, I had a conversation with one of my ladies today that truly spoke volumes to me about where many people are (especially women), when they step foot into the gym.  The mental battle they often face to leave everything at the door and focus on themselves for one workout is practically a spandex-laden war zone.  I'll delve into this more in my next post....
Right now it is nearly past my bedtime and I am struggling to keep my eyes open, much less form coherent sentences.
Geez....more to come...night folks...

Subway Headbutts and City Pics

Back to rural reality....but oh what a weekend.
It was my NYC trip with two of my favorite people, and we certainly had an amazing time but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited to see some greenery flying back into North Carolina.  It was great to visit and experience, but not sure I could live there.
For starters, I learned that eye-contact meant 1 of 2 things: I want to see you naked, or I want to cut you.  ....I pretty much gave that up after a few odd stares and potential death wish.
The entire subway experience was a cultural study in itself.  Me and my girlfriends would laugh and carry on, and people just stared at us as if we were about to pass on malaria via the giggles.  No laughing, no talking, and don't get cocky with your balance skills when the thing starts moving.  I nearly bit the dust a couple of times and started a domino effect simply because I thought assuming a "defensive stance" was going to be enough.
I stand corrected.  No pun intended.
Then there was the option of sitting.  Sounds ideal after a day of wondering through the city for hours with self-induced shin splints and exhausted hips. 
Again, not necessarily the best choice.
Numerous times I found myself sitting there with someone literally right in front of me.....fine if my face was not inches from a strangers crotch or backside.  Pick your poison.  One wrong move and I'd have a hard time explaining a black eye.
As I gazed straight ahead, I was often caught in the dilemma "Am I looking at it,...or is it looking at me?"....Ah yes, the questions that plague the mind on the subway in New York...I have yet to validate a proper answer.

The weekend was full of many laughs, lots of walking, great scenery (people included), and amazing food.  Yes, from sushi to pizza to a true NY bagel, I had to experience it all and basically carb load for the winter.  Best pizza I've ever had, and I dominated it like it was my job.
People mistakenly think I eat like a rabbit and have a small appetite,...ha...not true.  No, I don't normally eat like I did this weekend, but will not deprive myself.  I will say that after my pizza coma, I slept for 9 hours...I may have blacked out,...not exactly sure.
However, today I was definitely happy to resume my "normal" eating schedule and what not...starting with 3 cups of coffee at 4am.  Merry Christmas to me.

Ironically, Happy Feet and Sparkles head up there in a couple of weeks.  I know, the Parkers are invading NYC....the world is simply not ready.
I gave dad a serious talk today about his creeping-tendencies before going up there.  I swear he will literally talk to e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e if given the chance.  He's the Wal-mart greeter of life, which is fine in some situations...emphasis on "some".  I told him though, if he starts that mess up there and ends up in a jumpsuit with one phone call and a prayer,...don't call me. 
Between his inability to keep his hellos and smiles to himself in public, and sparkles' inability to navigate a turn-style, debit card, or general directions, I seriously cannot wait to hear stories about this upcoming adventure.
God help everyone.

Well, today was back to the grind with clients and Christmas prep and and and...
December 9th...geez...pretty soon we'll be welcoming a new year with extravagant plans of resolutions and what not.  Yes, I will definitely address that issue in a couple of weeks...brace yourself...the onslaught of tough love is about to overwhelm you....

I will leave you with a few pictures from my girls weekend....

Some potential living room art...

Apparently I didn't come up with this word,...disappointing news I must say...

Damn that pole...

Dick, Jane, and a Flogging..

Sunday pretty much flew by.
I rolled over at 5:30 this morning and basically gave my alarm the look of death, rolled back over, and resumed fetal position.
I prefer my left side.  Random factoid for your evening.

Despite being extremely tired all morning, I managed a workout without nodding off or cursing my own name.  But, not going to lie, it was one of those days when I was more than happy to be done.  Time to retire the spandex.....ok fine, for about 24 hours...

I made my way to the new Harris Teeter today.  They relocated my meat-men from the other HT over there (slightly perturbed), so I had to go visit.
I'm a sucker for great customer service.  Combined with fresh meat, my day is pretty much made and I'll assume we're friends for life.  We'll probably get matching bracelets.
All in all it was a solid shopping experience I capped off with some Starbucks before heading to meet a friend...
Apparently I wasn't thinking too clearly as I drooled over the Starbucks menu like the addict that I am, because I had to immediately head to Whole Foods to meet Kathryn.
Rule #2: Don't walk into Whole Foods with a Starbucks cup.
(Rule #1: Bring your own bag and wear running attire...whether you just ran is irrelevant)
With my coffee in hand, I might as well have thrown on a fur coat and held a "I'm against recycling" sign.  Yeah, I should have thought that one through a little more before risking a post-coffee flogging from random onlookers.

We sat there for over 2 hours solving all the world's problems except for our own.  Typical.
Laughing, crying, we had to cover the spectrum to complete the afternoon.  But the experience would not have been truly complete without the people watching. 
Thank God for window seats.
As we sat there discussing life, love, and the pursuit of all things non-cra-cra, we noticed a couple sitting outside with a table full of cards.  Back and forth, intense "play" of some sort, it was the most intriguing and yet boring thing I've witnessed. 
For a solid 20 minutes we couldn't figure it out,...and then ahh! he pulls out the box.
Lord of the Rings.
Lord of the damn Rings.
We're in there crying, marinading in sarcasm, and about to get sucker punched over a Starbucks cup, and meanwhile Dick and Jane are practically making out over a card game.
Life is indeed ironic and hilarious....

Well, I've got a full week ahead and then its off to New York with the gals!...I am beyond excited, but have a couple of big deadlines before then.  Ah yes, that's how it goes...
Here's to a new week folks...and holy crap its already December...