Early Morning Brutality

My Tuesday began at 3:30 this morning when I woke up from a dream that my best friend and I were battling with light sabers in the middle of Times Square.  Don't ask.  My dreams make no sense, but darned if I don't wake up laughing, crying, standing on the bed, or practically speaking Portuguese.  This morning I woke up in a sweat from the ridiculous futuristic-larping episode that evidently just took place.  At that point, the day was rolling and I needed to just get up and go with it.

As predicted, several clients stumbled in from a weekend of crappy food and booze.  It was a rude awakening for some, and one guy had the nerve to look at me, hungover, and say "Meredith, I need you to focus more on losing this (as he grabs his gut)".  I couldn't help but laugh at him because this is about the 3rd conversation we've had about his I-want-a-6-pack-but-not-willing-to-lay-down-the-6-pack attitude.  I had to use a more direct strategy to communicate my point.  Thus, I got a little louder and s-l-o-w-l-y explained once again that NO amount of working out or certain exercises makes up for a poor diet and chugging alcohol like water.  That was the nice, edited version....it sounded slightly different.  I think he got the point.
Don't blame a workout program or trainer if you're not going to do your homework in between.  You spend over 90% of your time outside of the gym....think about it...

Well, my workout today was great.  Honestly, I was in a serious zone that any pothead would have paid good money for.  My workouts have to be on point for the next 5 weeks in preparation for this photoshoot.  I'm at my last 1.5% of bodyfat to go, so it will literally be the biggest pain in the ass to get rid of.  Too bad its not in my breasts.  I shed that particular 1.5% by 10th grade.  The day I buy a bigger bra will be the day Jesus returns and steals the show...

9:00 already and I need to get some sleep before leg day tomorrow.  And in other big news....1 month til my birthday.  I get more pumped about birthdays than most 6 year olds.  It will officially be the last year of my twenties and I plan to make it epic.  And by epic I mean stay up past 10.  Living life in the fast lane...

Look Ma, No Pants!

Starting this at 8:47.  There is no telling what may hit the page...

It was a long day that had me confused from the very beginning.  Being that I missed Monday due to traveling, today felt like Tuesday and I was wandering like a nomad all day trying to figure out what the heck was going on.  After work I called my mom, which I always do on my way home, and instead of picking up and being her happy-crackhead-self, she goes "Why are you calling right now?".  Love you too mom.  I normally don't call on Wednesdays because their at church, and today she just happened  to be home with a migraine...meanwhile I was traveling I-40 convinced its Tuesday.  It all caught me off-guard.  After a 21 minute conversation her headache was either gone or I made it worse and she simply didn't have the heart to tell me.  My bet is on the latter...

A client brought me a Yiddish shirt today.  A few weeks ago I wrote about a Jewish client who wore a t-shirt that said "Got chutzpah?" and I thought it was the funniest thing.  Well, today he comes strolling in with one for me!  Made my day.  However he did say that if I needed a larger one, he could get it for me.  He clearly wasn't referring to my chest.  Anywho, I now own a Jewish shirt.  Happy hump day to me.

It almost looks like I don't have pants on.  Awesome.

To say I was d-r-a-g-g-i-n-g today would be an understatement.  I still have not recovered since the last 2 weeks of craziness, and today was no different.  It was a busy morning which rolled into a 40 minute lifting session,...then I have to leave for an appointment,...then come back to jump on the treadmill for 40 minutes before quickly showering and getting ready for my afternoon crowd.  Splitting up my workout is not on my list of top 10 things to do, but some days are just nuts and you do what you have to do.  My legs are tired which means tomorrow's leg day will suck.  My mom hates that word.  She also hates the word crap.  When I was 9 I asked her if I could say "crap" around the house (since it was the closest thing to cursing I could justify at that point), and she suggested I pray about it.  I went to the laundry closet, (praying on dirty underwear is not normal by the way), and came out 5 minutes later.  I told her that Jesus said as long as I don't say it to Him, its fine.
Explains quite a bit. 
Pretty sure that was the beginning of many "I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed in you Meredith" moments. 

Ok, it was a chicken-and-lots-of-greens kind of night, and now its time for bed.  Productive day,...a new one awaits.  Bring your A-game folks....no excuses.

Oh,...and photoshoot officially scheduled for July....game time. :)