Focus Forward

There are moments in my day when I am made well aware that my level of patience is equivalent to that of a newly potty trained 2 year old.
Today, that moment occurred at 5:15am.
I'm driving up to a railroad crossing and just as I'm approaching, its like time stood still and my personal episode of Back To The Future was about to end in sheer disappointment.  I didn't make it.  I was going to sit there for what would be the longest 2 minutes and 41 seconds of my day.
I could just picture my mom smiling and saying "Its ok dear, just practice patience..." 
Oh for the love of God.
What's my other option?  I choose that. 
Needless to say, I survived it.....and am no more patient than before the flashing red/white bars slowly lowered and killed my dreams before 6am.
Sorry mom.
Shine on dear woman, shine on....

Well, I'm not quite 100% from being sick this weekend, but today was the best day I've had since pre-turkey fest.  I felt stronger, wasn't breathing like a smoker, and made it through a tough back routine and some cardio.  And honestly, I actually enjoyed my cardio.  Crazy, I know, but I was just thankful to not be moving like a polio-infected amoeba.

* * *

On a more serious note...
There are many areas within my career that I am passionate about, but one that truly hits home is women's health and in particular, self-perception.
I am always blown away by the number of females who genuinely struggle with their self-image on a DAILY basis.  More than the I'm-feeling-bloated days here and there...but rather, a deep seeded insecurity masked behind a smile and continual strive for the "ideal" that does not exist. 
As I spoke with a woman today about it I could literally feel myself getting heated because I wanted to shake some sense into her. 
Its a shame to see a beautiful, athletic, healthy woman beat herself up over NOTHING and choose to live in pit.  Do I think events and circumstances contribute to our self perception?  Absolutely.  But at the end of the day, we have a choice.  We can stay in the unhealthy cycle of illusions and perfection-driven habits, or we can break the cycle and dare to not just apathetically accept who we are, but THRIVE and GROW. 
I've heard it a thousand times...You don't understand because you've never had kids and have stretch marks......You don't get how tough it is to watch yourself get older.......Things change and I can't wait until you're  -- years old....
Ok, you're right.
I don't have kids.  I'm 29, not 49.  I get it.
Here's to the extent I understand...
I cannot move like I did when I was playing volleyball, running track, and playing softball.  I cannot eat whatever I want and expect optimal results.  And dear Lord, my inner thighs do not look the same they did a decade ago.
Those of you 10 years older roll your eyes.  Fine.  The woman 10 years older than you rolls hers.  And the woman at the top of the food chain gives us all the finger.
That's life and this game could go on and on.

Here's the deal...at some point we accept age and body changes for what they are WITH the understanding that it is our responsibility and ours alone to take care of it.  Will "FIT" at 30 look the same as fit at 20?  No.  Will "fit" at 50 look the same as fit at 30?  No.  Why should we expect it to?  Dare to believe that you are constantly creating a better version of yourself.  The journey continues and the best is yet to come...focus forward.  You can either make it great and embrace the opportunity to love and appreciate yourself/health, or you can drive yourself crazy seeking validation in an unattainable goal.
It is a choice.

Sincerely, my desire for all women is this: 
Respect your body.  Take responsibility.  Keep moving forward. 


Its been an exhausting day on so many levels.
I need sleep, a little refocus, and for that horrible train to wait until after 6am to pass...